I want the knife to go across my neck
I want my brain to be shattered behind me with a bang
I want the water shallow me whole
I want someone to beat me senseless
I want to wonder aimless off the road
I want my breathe taken away from me.
Just make it go away.
Be gone
Be away
Be nothing more.
Why can’t I just drop dead? Why not? Please just let me.
I don’t want to be strong anymore.
Because it means loneliness.
Loneliness do not kill, but a curse from a beating heart
That do not know when to quit.
I want it to stop. I want the loneliness to stop. If I made a new friends or make a new family, I will still eventually lose that again and be in this position again. It will come back to you like a old sick, stalking friend. This will happen again and I am not strong enough for other one that soon.
2 comments
Oh Bean. I don’t want you to be sad. I wish I could help you, but I don’t know how. There is an upside to this. Please pardon me. My mind just isn’t working the way I want it to.
You’ve made some positive changes lately. Nothing works overnight. Keep focused on the good things that you’re doing. I know it’s frustrating. I’m sorry Bean. I’m probably not making any sense.
Don’t worry, Wings, you make sense still. Thank you.. 🙂