I’ve sat here, countless days, haven’t left the house, haven’t DONE anything, I have no purpose, nobody is willing to hear my cries, even my best friend, whom I thought was exactly like me cant see anything wrong. Im leaving to go to Japan in 12 days, and after that, when I get back, Im going to go see her and then, then Im done. Im done not having a reason to live, im done being hurt by everyone, im done with my deadbeat family who always bash on me. there is no way that im going to sit here and let this happen. so, on August 9th 2018, I will release all of my research, programming, papers, and hard drives to the internet for anybody to use, then I will disappear and monitor where it all goes for a year or so and then off myself. this is the final straw, if nothing happens between now and then, than thats it.
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Please stay. Forgive your family and get your power back.you have value and you are worthy of a great life.
you are more than worthy….your best friend might be aware of your situation and want to talk. sometimes i get confused about best friends….ie i consider this one person my best friend, but i dont know if they consider me a friend at all….please stay though…
Hi ctrz. Maybe it will help to enlighten us and talk to us about why you have come to this point. Talk to us. How did everything bring you to this position? I can tell you stories about my own life that will make you shivver. Best friends that you lost? I have also being there – especially a friend you met when you were young, screwed up, and then life got it that way that you met this person at completely RANDOM somewhere else in the world, and then, lo-and-behold, he does exactly the same thing. You think by yourself if there is some sort of entity that just wish you ill. I hope you can see it is not only you but other people that this happens to; but the fact that we can come together and talk about this provides a frame for a new friendship. People from this place will be your most loyal and trusted friends. We are all sensitive people who suffer tremendously in a cruel, cold world. And we can make it work together. You say you are angry at your family and a girl( I suppose). But to end it just because of a girl and family is a bit over the top. It really isn’t rational. I can speak from a man who have being involved in the PUA community and approached over 7000 women. I have met 5 girls I fell “head over heels” for. They all ended up rejecting me, and throughout weeks I would vomit and be depressed. But I ended up on the other end of not caring. This type of things takes time but eventually you just don’t give a toss anymore. You have so much potential. You do not live with chronic pain; you can stand up and you have the potential to smile. I on the other hand live with chronic pain and I am 27 years old. I cannot have the option of a happy life. Please live for the sake of people like me. You have it in you to be the person you want to be if you are willing to put in the hard work. Your life is NOT over. So please elaborate more. What exactly is your worst fears and what exactly brought you to this point?