Tired not tired

I am tired of the feeling my body and my life gives me, I feel cheated and taken advantage of. I am not calling my father today to wish him a happy father’s day. I have tried my whole life to develop a solid relationship and believe that he could have shielded me from some of these happenings. Whatever though. I will keep wanting to die until I die because I see no hope, honestly. Please do not compare your life with mine because you don’t know the half.

If I use my method, it fails, I’ll be messed up health wise plus I’ll lose my decent paying job.