Low

I don’t know how to feel. One moment I’m the happiest I’ve ever been and in that same breath everything falls apart.

When I was with her, I was complete. It was like learning what love actually supposed to be for the very first time. A tornado inside both of us that we could not control and eventually broke me apart.

Have you ever tripped and for a slight moment that adrenaline rush hits you like a ton of bricks and you get hot, scared, and exhilarated all at once? That heat that spreads all over and reminds you that you’re still alive? That’s the best way that I could describe what it felt like.

I let my guard down.  It started out as a game; a way to pass the time. I’ll admit, I’m an opportunist; The worst of the worst. I was already in a relationship but always kept looking for something else. A fix, a thrill, a moment? I don’t know. Anything that could make me feel something.

Then that’s when the tornado hit. Before I could realize what was happening, It was already too late for me. The warmth of that first forbidden touch, the taste of her mouth, that first aching thrust, the drugging dizziness for more and more that consumes you both. Was it all in my head? Was I the only fucking fool feeling all of that?

Fuck I want to forget everything! So much time has passed and it still feels like yesterday.

Fuck this pain. Fuck that *****.