I don’t know how or why, but I deserve all of this. I am a bad person. I deserve to be punished. I deserve all of the suffering I am a victim of. I am a bad person. I deserve all the pain I feel. I deserve this.
I don’t know who to apologise to.
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I’m also a bad person, who could be said to deserve any suffering that is experienced (and I do know how and why.) Thing is, I’m not sure reality at large much cares what you do or don’t deserve. Desert is social – it’s seeing yourself through the lens of comparison to others. If there’s no one specific to apologise to, I suppose all that matters is whether you have the capacity and motivation to do differently in future.
I would just apologize to god and repent so you can get into heaven. You’ll probably be ok so long as you haven’t committed treachery.
Cause of Death: Suicide – I am so happy to see you. :X
Yes, the concept of sin is important. Yes, we truly need to feel that we need to repent but self-hatred is wrong!
” I deserve all the pain I feel. I deserve this.”
It all really sucks. Sometimes I tell myself the same thing. I say to me I deserve this situation I’m in. Somehow it makes me feel like things are at least right and how they should be a little bit with that. Like at least there’s this positive spin on it. However…
“I don’t know how or why, but I deserve all of this.”
I know that with regards to you this is a load of crap. Sorry, but that’s my opinion on it. Just because you are in a hell of pain and angry as fuck, doesn’t mean you deserve it. Really doubt anyone here wants you going through what you do or anyone else around here for that matter.