I can’t take anymore of these endless tortuous days. I have had hope for years of getting better and determined to find an answer but now, I don’t have any energy left for hope anymore. I’m not getting better and obviously I’m not going to get any better so it’s time to plan for leaving. I have to wind up a few things and find a way to leave first. I really wanted to get better but it’s not working out that way.
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Dear fellow human, please don’t go through with your plan to “leave”. You may want to end the pain, but you might not want to die. If you have a breath left to breathe, please, use it to at least say “fuck it” to any and all that make you feel like you’re bound and, if life really is a joke, then do whatever you want to do without any regard for what others might think or whether it’s possible or not. If you have reached this state of mind, there is nothing to lose anymore, so be fearless then, my friend.
Please reconsider.
Yea I don’t know what better is but I’ve never wanted to get better, all I’ve wanted is to get deader lol. It’s days like today where I wish I would’ve died back in elementary school when I first became suicidal. Life is just a pathetic, sick joke. LMAO. I can’t believe I’m still alive and now I am completely unable to kill myself because I am no longer able to function after being raped 175 times this year.