unsure

i dunno what to name this, you don’t have to read. just something i wrote…

They tell you “you’re not alone”
but why am i staring at my dry ass phone?
sitting here wishing this house was a home.
room full of people but my mind takes over and i feel by myself.
they tell you “you should reach out for help”
but opening up I pour to much and drowned everyone that wants to care.
then you hear other people’s problems talking about how their life isn’t fair.
when your life’s been a battle since your very first breath.
every day in your head, thinking about death.
try to appreciate the little things, isolate and collect yourself again,
maybe i just need a good friend?
maybe i need not to pretend
toxic relationship with myself i need to mend.
put on my mask, fake this laugh, have this conversation it’s only a hour and a half.
your life is summed up in just a couple lines, cause at the end of the session i tell them i’m fine. all i need is time, but in reality i’m paying the blind.
chin check, check my texts, figure out what’s next. live my life, on my grind, remind myself i still have time.
i have a daughter i can’t leave behind.

-Angelica

#PoemsByAngelica