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How do I know when its time.

by itistimeformetogoyet

I am just so tired. I do not want to hurt my family or my friends, I do not want to become more of a burden dead than I am alive. But I do not want to be here anymore. No part of me wants to live and the only reason I am is to protect others. I can’t keep living just to make others happy. I haven’t wanted to live since I was in 3rd grade, I am now a sophomore in college. Yes, look at how far I have come. You can tell me to keep going. I don’t want to. I want my family to understand that I just need to die. Help isn’t helping, I don’t even want it to. I just want to leave and finally be at peace, be with my father and my dog up in heaven.

It would break my family, but living is breaking me.

I wish they could understand and accept it so I could say goodbye, leave them knowing they did nothing wrong.

3 comments
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3 comments

Abnormal.Thoughts 12/9/2020 - 12:18 am

Me too. But I do hope you find what makes you feel fulfilled and a desire to keep going. It sounds like you have some opportunity to do that.

JudgeMeNot 12/9/2020 - 1:22 am

You’ll know when times up. It will be tragic and blissful.

Goodluck.

eternaldarkness 12/10/2020 - 8:07 pm

Perhaps make it look like an accident instead of a suicide?

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