Wow, I can’t believe it’s been three years since I’ve seen A. I’ve been trying to think of a way to explain it but the only thing I can compare it to that comes to mind is like spiritual pressure in the anime Bleach. I know there’s some American superhero with a tragic story like that, where they’re bound to be alone, except by that one person who can withstand whatever it is they’re radiating without being affected. Somehow I have no clue who the fuck I’m talking about though. It’s probably someone really obvious. But it’s like spiritual pressure from “Bleach”. The longer I expose myself to people the more damaged they become. And the fucked up thing is people don’t believe me even as I watch my abuser’s body language manifest in them through me, them infecting their mind through me similar to the way they crippled me. It’s too fucked up to go into detail. I can’t. Anyways she was the only one who seemed to be immune to these horrors and who could see me for who I really was. It really was beautiful. I’m sorry A. I’m sorry. I just don’t know how anyone’s supposed to live like this.