i hate how everything can be all happy and fine then within the blink of an eye, the snap of fingers, SMASH!!!! everything goes downhill, everything goes wrong. within seconds things are getting thrown, hit.
im tried of it….. people say its “fine” that they understand its a condition, but one just cant help feeling horrible and down when it happens. you just want to sweep it under the rug and bury your head in the sand hoping to forget that the mess you created exists, the problem you live with exists, that you exists….
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Oh man. I know the feeling. I myself have BPD. I would say relationships are my worse nightmare. Things seem all good for sometime and then something bad has to happen. It’s the worse.
I hate how it complicates everything.
I have crippling social anxiety but thank you bpd, I’m also very social. And I swear it does that with everything and there’s always a reason things just won’t work out.
I’m sorry
Why do you believe that personality disorders exist? What if there are no such things as personality disorders?
Fifty years ago psychiatry was dying out. Pharmacutical companies donated a lot of money into raising awareness of said conditions so more people would think they had them, go to the doctor and be given more drugs. If the person has a personality disorder the person is considered defective for life and therefore needs to be on said drugs all his or her life.
How do you know you have a personality disorder? Did you even have an MRI scan?
How about a blood test, x-ray or DNA test? No.
How do you think the disorder came into existence? It was voted into existence by a committee sponsored by the same companies who make the mediation. There was no science involved with this at all.
It’s solely someone’s opinion. They can’t prove you have it. It’s a man-made label based on how the other person interprets your symptoms and they can get it wrong. There are over a hundred mental disorders in the DSM. It’s impossible for any single person on Earth not to fall into at least one of them.
I’ll use two contrasting examples…
Dependent Personality Disorder.
To get this disorder you need to meet at least five of the following criteria…
(1) Has difficulty making everyday decisions without an excessive amount of advice and reassurance from others.
(2) Needs others to assume responsibility for most major areas of his or her life.
(3) Has difficulty expressing disagreement with others because of fear of loss of support or approval.
Note: Do not include realistic fears of retribution.
(4) has difficulty initiating projects or doing things on his or her own (because of a lack of self-confidence in judgment or abilities rather than a lack of motivation or energy)
(5) Goes to excessive lengths to obtain nurturance and support from others, to the point of volunteering to do things that are unpleasant.
(6) Feels uncomfortable or helpless when alone because of exaggerated fears of being unable to care for himself or herself.
(7) Urgently seeks another relationship as a source of care and support when a close relationship ends.
(8) Is unrealistically preoccupied with fears of being left to take care of himself or herself.
Isn’t this most Western woman pre-1900?
How about Narcissistic Personality Disorder?
Again, a person seeds to meet five of these points to have the disorder…
(1) Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements).
(2) Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.
(3) Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions).
(4) Requires excessive admiration.
(5) Has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations.
(6) Is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends.
(7) Lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others.
(8) Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her.
(9) Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes.
How many young men have you met like this? Probably a lot. But many of them grow out if it and no longer display these behaviours and become decent, fun loving people. It doesn’t mean they have a personality disorder.
A lot of what influences these supposed disorders is cultural and relates to the background religion each society is set in, including remnants of historical gender roles and expectations. This is partly why Dependent Personality Disorder is diagnosed mostly in women and Narcissistic Personality Disorder is diagnosed mostly in men.
Whether or not the person meets the criteria is completely subjective based supposedly on what’s considered normal in a given society but really it’s about what’s considered normal to the person making the diagnosis, who may be from another culture themself.
In Ireland you may have Dependent Personality Disorder, in Saudi Arabia you may not have it. In Norway you might have Narcissistic Personality Disorder, in America you might not have it. In England you may have Borderline Personality Disorder, in Liberia you may not have it.
Every government in every country propages some falsehood or other.
The more you tell yourself you have a personality disorder the more you’ll meet the criteria. You may have met the criteria for the label during six months of your life. The rest of your life you’d no longer meet the criteria for it. If, hypothetically you were assessed for the first time one year after when you were actually assessed you’d be told you do not have the disorder. But if you have already been given the label and are assessed but don’t meet the criteria anymore the disorder label remains there.
If you have been given the label of Borderline Personality Disorder you were forced to come into the world without your consent and then terrorised and made to suffer. This isn’t your fault.
When you eventually broke away from the situation you were existing in and surviving and had some sort of mental breakdown without knowing how to get any help for this (due to being isolated from the normal functioning of the world in childhood) and get diagnosed in the hospital after a self-harm or a suicide attempt, you were doing what any neurotypical person would do after escaping an unnatural and scary and in some cases horrific environment. Being diagnosed with any personality disorder, I think, is wrong. You didn’t ask to be born, you didn’t ask to be traumatised and left until adulthood in that situation. It’s only natural you’d be an emotional wreck. There would be something wrong with you if you weren’t an emotional wreck. But you don’t have to be an emotional wreck for the rest of your life. This isn’t your ‘destiny’. This isn’t real in the sense that you think it is. You’re under no obligation to be the same person you were a year ago.
BPD does suck, honestly am an idiot as well and don’t feel like living