well Maisie… i think of it of it as an ocean-sailing journey, sort of…

People start off with different capabilities & gain or lose capabilities as they sail ahead…
Some start with a cruise ship
Others manage to turn a moderate boat into a yacht
& others start with or lose everything & end up with nothing but a wooden plank & a single rowing oar

Sometimes the course gets turbulent
Sometimes the waves get too high
Sometimes You happen to sail straight through a hurricane or tsunami & there’s just nothing You can do to avoid it…

Sometimes your vessel capsizes
Sometimes it completely breaks apart

but also
Sometimes

Another sailor passing by could throw You a lifebuoy or an inflatable boat
or invite You to their own boat until You can fix or make yours

Sometimes You get to a point where You master the craft well enough
& no amount of trouble stops You from moving ahead

& Sometimes
the water is So calm
& the scenery is So magestic
that You’d feel ‘maybe all this pain is worth it’

& i’d say, one could feel it infintely more intensely
even when the waters aren’t clam & the scenery isn’t beautiful
even when You’re sailing straight through the hurricane
if
You have a somewhat solid idea as to
where exactly You’re sailing to… what land You’re trying to reach…
& *why* You’re sailing to it in the first place

One would then know deep within, in every moment, with every breath
that, yes, the pain might be ongoing,
but the ‘aim’ & the ‘destination’ make it far more than worth it

hope this makes any sense
or at least helps, even if only slightly
<3