Books

I’ve been reading a lot to escape my thoughts and my feelings I used to hate reading and my sister loved it that’s how she coped with everything that happened with my dad  I never actually finished a chapter book until I turned 15 because she made me read her favorite book. But I can’t decide how I actually feel about the endings though, sometimes they are happy and I just think to my self it’s not realistic this isn’t how it’s going to be for me other times it makes me feel better gives me a little hope that everything will be ok. When the endings are bad I don’t know how to feel. I get angry when the person forgives someone in the book when they do something terrible to them because it’s like how can you forgive them how can you move past that I think maybe it’s cause it’s so hard for me to forgive, if I forgive someone how do I know they won’t do it again, won’t hurt me again, and then when they do I look stupid and I’m stuck feeling like it’s my fault because I know that if they did it once they would do it again. But when the book ends I feel so many different things but mainly I feel sad because it’s over the characters the setting it just ends and I don’t know how to deal with it, it feels like a loss I don’t really know how else to describe it.