I feel like nobody and I’m done with therapy because my idiot therapist can’t help me and he just tried to guilt trip me on how he thought it was wrong that I tried to KMS in the past and he tries to tell me with stigmatizing language that I’m wrong for trying to escape the pain in the past, but yet tries to justify everyone else for pushing me to that point and making me feel this way just because they’re in authority! I feel like I’m a fucking slave to this pain and I’m obligated to stay in this earth with this mental illness that no one can understand or even relate to because I fight this burden alone on a basis. Why do people demand me to take accountability for my own feelings and not just my own actions but yet they can’t take accountability for hurting me? I feel like I’m not even entitled to my own emotions and I don’t even wanna share them anywhere besides here. It’s not like it matters what I gotta say anyway. And stupid therapy ain’t therapy anymore, because if it was, my therapist would try to understand the reason why I tried to ctb in the past, instead of stigmatizing me and shaming me for making that decision! And all he says is “I wanna have this session to make you feel better, not worse.” Bullsh*t. I don’t wanna be here another day, but I’m gonna have to, because it don’t matter what I feel worth a shit and I don’t ever wanna be thrown in a psych ward with complete strangers ever again.
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4 comments
Your therapist is a shit therapist. I have yet to find a good one. And there’s literally only a FEW ppl I have ever talked to that have told me they have found a GOOD therapist.
If your therapist is making you feel worse, quit going. Or find another one. No sense in going to see a therapist that doesn’t help and make you feel worse. Trust me, I’ve been there.
I don’t judge anyone for doing drugs, alcohol, psychedelics etc. In a life so empty what else have we? Forced to repeat the same work week for 50 years to make those who stole our lives from us richer. That’s not a life worth even remembering.
Everyone…everyone who ‘abuses’ a substance has a valid reason as to why they have landed there.
I myself ‘abuse’ anabolic steroids because I have an inconsolable disdain for how weak humans (de)evolved, added to that my own relative genetic inferiority. This de-evolution into utter technological dependence due to our lack of any physical tools, and gravitation to hierarchal orders in place of instinct, is exactly why we are in this societal mess to begin with.
As for therapists, I went once…just once. Seeing the 40 euros for the consultation leave my pocket was all the ‘therapy’ I needed, there’s nobody going to help me but me, and these people, like everything else in this vapid empty world is there to extract coin from our suffering.
I realize too though, many have nowhere else to turn, unlike me, the spoiled brat writing this, many come from hellish homes and untold misery, and like the caffiene boost, the therapy can help at least to stay the pain for a while.
In your position I’d of course seek an alternate therapist, first prize would be finding a way to heal on your own but such a notion does sweep past the demons you may face that I’ll hardly fathom. I’ll say this though, you are worthy to feel any emotion for it is there upon you for a reason, you are entitled to feel because you are a human being, thats that.
right? how can we feel happy if 40 Euros (or however much) leave our pockets after EACH session? Even if it was a decent or GOOD therapist, how can one continually support that habit? Not week after week.
In the US, if covered by insurance, it’s 10-25 USD per session, depending on your insurance. If not covered by insurance, it’s about $60-90/session. And I’ve seen it as much as $120/session. It’s just insane. For $60-$90, I’d rather pay for a massage, which is likely more helpful than for any therapist to nod their head every few min and scribble some useless notes in their pad.
everyone is always wagging their finger and telling us it’s our fault if we have depression and we don’t even bother to go to therapy. As if the avg American can afford a therapist without insurance. As if the the avg therapist has any appt times that isn’t a million weeks in advance, or even taken new patients. As if seeing a therapist is automatically going to get rid of depression. As if the avg therapist is any good (they aren’t).