i wonder what it’s like to be happy and loved…and taken care of and not always worry about things like starving or going hungry, or always being cold bc we had no heat, or not having money to buy necessary things like shoes that don’t have holes in them.
i wonder what it’s like to actually be loved and accepted as a human being, as i’ve never had that as a child. to be loved and accepted with no conditions, like just being born and loved. that is what MOST kids had, but i didn’t get jack shit. no love, no acceptance, only being blamed for being born, and for the audacity for being born a female at that. not that i had any CHOICE in that matter. not that i had any choice WHO I was unfortunately born to either.
WHY did I have to be born to the shitty family I was born to? If my parents were someone else, my life would have been completely different. All I wanted was a FAIR chance. All I asked for was AVERAGE. Not the shit life I had since birth. And STILL a shit life many decades later.
and ppl wonder why i’m such a “negative” person. i mean i still had hope in my 20s. but after 30…and after 40…how long do I have to wait for “good things to come”? That shit is never going to happen to me it seems. Bc if it would, it would have fucking HAPPENED by now.
i mean, when you start out life at 7yo getting beaten and abused by family, and all you’ve ever know is pain and loneliness, then how does one NOT be depressed or negative or jaded or suspicious of people’s intents? how am i supposed to be a happy-happy upbeat positive person when NOTHING good has ever happened in my life? (i mean sustain good not a fleeting day or two of good).
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I wish with all I have that it was transferrable. But there’s an expectation that comes with it that I’ve never been able to meet; that I be of some use to society. It was nailed into me so hard how lucky I was to have two parents, to not be beaten, to never go hungry….. and it just never was an option not to be that.
but I think you’d have to find a way to surround yourself with equally healthy people, you’d have to have no interest at all in the pain and misery that dominates our species.
So instead I am unjustifiably unhappy, unjustifiably dissatisfied, undeservedly depressed.
did your parents actually love and accept you, or they just took care of basic physical needs?
at least on the surface level they did. This was during the 1990s and early 2000s, the standard of care for neurodivergent and disabled people was terrible at the time. I can only blame them so much, part of it has to be the time and resources available to them. I think they tried to understand and accept me.
They both worked, and there might be a case for neglect because of that. The first decade of my life I hardly saw them, it was various programs and other stuff to keep me occupied so they could work. But I’ve seen so much worse neglect, which is why I’m hesitant to label them as neglectful.
Really the chances are I’m screwed up because of the institutions that raised and shaped me. They expected a very specific standard of behavior that I couldn’t meet. If it weren’t for my parents resources I would have ended up a career criminal. Still, it’s only my anger management that keeps me from generating enough rage to hurt others.
well in all fairness, it’s normal to feel depressed when one feels like there’s no purpose or not fulfilling what one was meant to do in life, or be useful in life in some way. i think you just need to find a good job to feel useful (not a burn out one where they just take every drop from you) and one that pays decent so you’re not grossly underpaid.
“but I think you’d have to find a way to surround yourself with equally healthy people, you’d have to have no interest at all in the pain and misery that dominates our species.”
>my problem is that i can’t seem to make any long lasting meaningful friends. no one cares, and no one understands. ppl who are disabled or chronically ill are chucked aside by the normal society, bc we are seen as worthless.
and those who are also chronically ill, are terrible at keeping/maintaining relations bc they’re also sick dealing with their shit.
Sorry to burst your bubble, darkness, but even with all of those things, I still ended up here. You could have what others view as a “perfect” life but still feel so empty inside that even the homeless feel more alive than you do.
this, oh so much this.
I never said those who had love and had a good childhood cannot be depressed or have problems. i just said that *I* personally don’t know what it’s like to be loved / feel loved / and be taken care of.
While it is true that even kids who have ‘everything’ still suffer as much as anyone else, I think Eternal has a very valid point.
At the very least kids should be brought into a world where they have a home, all their basic needs are met…that they don’t suffer from abuse, etc.
What happens afterwards is fair game, but shouldn’t every child get a fair shake at life? That on its own is horrendous and generally is a cause for lifelong suffering.
It’s like comparing me to my sister for example….she has a typical life most people strive for, a big beautiful house, a couple of kids and cars.
Ofc they have their struggles, mostly around money…and she has her problems but she tries to somehow claim her suffering is as bad as mine if not worse, which is absurd.
She has a house with all the perks/benefits it brings like safety, privacy, independence, quiet, comfort, etc. Ok the big thing is that you have to pay for it all somehow, which they are…so if you can manage that much, you have close to a perfect life as you can get on this planet (short of being rich).
Even more, as they own a business, she only puts in about 4-5 hrs a day on a laptop and phone to keep it running, the rest of the time they’re free to do whatever they want. Before they made some pretty stupid decisions like buying other properties at the top of the market-which put them in major debt, they were regularly vacationing and enjoying the ‘good life.’
Now compare that with me who rents, has shitty neighbors, deals with noise and temperature issues where I live and deal with other crappy problems.
I just moved last year to get out of a bad situation but nobody knows the future and ended up in something similar…though this place is still much better than the last one. I am trying to make the best of my situation but I think I’ll be forced to move this year again. This time however I plan to rent a condo or (town)house…if in my budget so I get away from the problems I have and it should give me way more peace than I have now.
So that’s not to say people in the middle and upper class don’t have hard lives, but at least you don’t have to deal with even worse issues that people in the lower rungs of society have to suffer with and those problems should not even exist in first world countries.
The one thing kids shouldn’t have to suffer through is low income and living in rental properties. It’s selfish and evil to bring kids into the world if a person can barely make ends meet…do the noble thing, either increase your income drastically first and then have kids or leave this world if you can’t break out of your lowly state in life. But people don’t think and the cycle repeats.
“What happens afterwards is fair game, but shouldn’t every child get a fair shake at life? That on its own is horrendous and generally is a cause for lifelong suffering.”
>Exactly. Those who start life with abuse, poverty, neglect, or just a shitty home life tend to have lifelong mental, emotional or physical issues. And yet we’re expected to cross the finish line like everyone else when we don’t even have shoes to run the race (in my case i literally didn’t have a pair of shoes that didn’t have holes or my proper size to wear).
Indeed…it really just shouldn’t happen. While we’re at it…I should mention good looks as well. If some people are unattractive, they shouldn’t pass on their genes, like those who are obese, have bad skin, or possess any kind of genetic diseases and mental illness.
These evil creatures know full well they are unattractive/degenerate, and have other problems they will pass onto their children (aside from poverty), but they’re either so desperate to prove to others somebody wanted to fork them or they have kids to look after them in old age as Eternal mentioned.
So imagine now the child is not only behind in the rat race with money, but they have problems with height, being fat and having other issues that make them an even bigger loser than they would’ve been otherwise.
But if we discuss putting in some basic standards to regulate breeding of our species and you’ll hear people start screaming about eugenics and call us ‘nazis.’
There is a huge difference between setting basic standards for allowing people to have kids, than to shoving handicapped people into gas chambers…nobody is saying that.
But even that shows that we already abort millions of degenerates every year for genetic deformities and downs syndrome….so this is simply a logical extension of the same idea.
“So that’s not to say people in the middle and upper class don’t have hard lives, but at least you don’t have to deal with even worse issues that people in the lower rungs of society have to suffer with and those problems should not even exist in first world countries.”
>EXACTLY. Anytime I mention poverty or childhood abuse, some ppl automatically jump on the defensive/offensive and say, “well ppl who are well-to-do also have problems!” Ofc they can. Nowhere in any of my posts I claim rich ppl or ppl who had a good family can NEVER have ANY problems or also have depression. Lots of fucking reasons to be depressed. >.<
And yes, ppl on the lower economic rungs DO have to deal with even worse issues that ppl who are less bad off don't have to deal with. Like the noise/neighbor issue you brought up. OMG, I HATE where I am right now. Living in a fucking tiny closet of a room, and all noise and vibrations travel to me.
While I might still be depressed if I lived in a nice house or mansion, I would at least be more comfortable and have less issues to deal with than living in a shit apt in a shit neighborhood with shit neighbors.
OH YEAH- did i mention, i got a fucking BACTERIAL INFECTION from living in this shitty apt? stuff that you don't get if you live in a NICER building or apt. I have never lived in a crappy place, and have never had so many infections and so much fucking pain in my life, until i moved into my mom's dirty hoarder house (i did not know the condition when i moved in, and my area i was told was *supposed* t have been completely renovated, which it wasn't, hence all this crap i'm dealing with).
Oh yeah, I was in the ER then in-patient at the hospital for 6 fucking days, and had to see multiple drs, including an infectious disease dr. I have NEVER in my life got any kind of bacterial infection in my LIFE until I moved here. So yeah, if you live in a shithole apt, you're screwed. Sure, I was still depressed when I lived in much better apts for years/decades before I came here, but life wasn't this fucking miserable dealing with infection after infection.
Ya exactly there was a movie (Man who knew Infinity) a while back about some Indian mathematician kid who want to Britain and shared his theories and blew away the profs.
But he ended up dying cause they stuck him in a room which didn’t have adequate heat and he got pneumonia and died…what a way to treat a math genius. It’s a silly reason to die but another case of ‘the basics matter.’
And ofc like in your situation, you wouldn’t have suffered all these infections and other health issues if not for where you live and I wish you the best in getting out of that place into something better for you.
I wish people like you and I eternal had made it to the top in gov’t…the answers exist, the solutions are there, it just takes enough money and you can lift millions out of terrible situations….my sociology prof once said it’d only take 1% of the GDP to end homelessness.
But no govt in power has any desire on interest in ending poverty. Many of these azzholes blame the victim and say things like they’re “lazy and don’t want to work.” Ignoring the years of suffering that lead people who might’ve even been middle class before, down that terrible road.
it’s bc politicians and corporations grow wealthier the sicker and poorer the population is, and hence this is what we get.
True apathy but also profit…what a crappy world we live in.
All the more reason to have universal euthanasia…we were forced into existence, so every human should have the right to leave it if we wanted.
This right should be enshrined in all our constitutions.
lol they’d never allow it. you think these mafia guys are just gonna let all the (medical/housing/student/cc) debt be erased when someone euthanizes themselves? never. this is why euthanasia isn’t allowed. don’t be fooled these ppl care about morality and that it’s “wrong” to kill oneself. they just won’t allow peasants to escape their debt. bc that’s exactly what ppl would do if they could euthanize themselves.
Ya it might make sense, they could make it harder to escape one’s debts. In Canada you can declare bankruptcy and you’re debt free, except for student loans, they stay with you for 14 yrs, last I recall though maybe they changed that rule.
Also companies wouldn’t want workers to suddenly die off and might find ways to trap people in their crappy lives.
But I don’t think we’ll get large reduction in the population. Most people want to live and have a ‘good life.’ Assuming society provides them that opportunity they’ll stick around.
However those who don’t want to live will be free to disappear forever and everyone will be ‘happier’ knowing that option is there and that they don’t have to jump off a bridge or do something else that’s drastic to get out of a bad existence.
i just don’t see our overlords letting us peasants escape our debts. death is the ONLY way to escape our debt, and you would be shocked just HOW many ppl WOULD off themselves to escape their debt, especially families. what’s to stop a father or mother from borrowing money and accruing a ton of debt only to purposely off themselves so it takes care of their children? lots of single parents already do this by committing suicide after 2-3 years of getting life insurance (in the US you have to wait 2-3 years if u want to be paid by life insurance, and some policies do not allow the payment if death is via suicide).
this “trick” of getting life insurance and then committing sui,cide is so common, they have that 2-3 year clause. you don’t know just HOW many ppl are willing to die to leave something for their children.
so if sui,cide was widely available and legal, yes, TONS of ppl would do it.
look at abortion- it’s similar in vein. once it became a non-taboo, lots of ppl have abortions throughout the world. the only ppl who are averse to it are the ultra religious. the same will be for sui,cide if ppl were allowed to self-abort, and especially able to leave something behind to their loved ones.
think about it this way- how willing are you to off yourself if you could enter a self-abortion booth, flip a switch and have insurance pay out to your sister/mother/niece/etc so they’re all taken care of?
you haven’t experienced poverty. those who haven’t experienced poverty do not understand or know the level of desperation ppl are willing to do to die/escape their life/help their family.
this already exists in some extent- ie. “kidney island.” there’s this place in SE Asia where the whole population there lives in abject poverty. Rich Americans and Brits (mostly those) offer to pay them $$ for their kidney. Ppl do this so they can feed their family.
So many ppl opt to do this that it’s nicknamed “kidney island.” many of these ppl die/get horribly sick/weak as a result of the procedure. also, many get scammed and don’t get paid, which by then is too late bc they’ve already got their organ, and how can these poor ppl come after them to get paid? they know all this and yet they do this anyway, bc what are their options? there is no escape from poverty for them except this procedure where they HOPE they get paid. they know the risks and do it anyway. what wouldn’t you do if you had a starving child? they get paid 1/2 before the procedure and 1/2 after the procedure. and half of those get scammed and don’t get paid. but even knowing the risks, ppl are so desperate, they take the chance anyway. knowing they risk not getting paid the other 1/2 or getting sick or dying.
also, you’re “relatively” healthy. you do not know the desperation of someone who is very sick and want to escape this hellhole. If you’re very sick, you are desperate to end this shit. I’m not even considered a “bad” case given my health problems compared to others and I’m on the edge of wanting to fucking end all this pain.
you have no idea the amount of pain and suffering SO many ppl in the USA and around the world ppl are suffering from. 50% of ALL humans live in poverty. let that sink in.
so yes, tons of ppl WOULD sui,cide if they could, if it was available.
but it’s absolutely NOT our master’s benefit if ppl die and don’t pay off their debt. or the cheap labor supply shrink if ppl were allowed to easily sui,cide. just take a look at the USA currently. TONS of illegal migrants are coming in, and done by design bc a cheap labor force is what our overlords want. you think they wouldn’t or couldn’t shut this down at the snap of a finger if they wanted to? they don’t which is why this is happening.
Correction to my note on student loans in Canada…they reduced it from 14 yrs now down to 7 years…which is a lot better….it’s still a long time but at least for a student struggling in a bad life, they can be fully debt free after 7 years.
I’ll admit I came extremely close to declaring bankruptcy myself…and at the time it would’ve been the right thing to do…but I think it was a good thing that I didn’t and I paid off some student loans that popped up…dealing with 1 more, which is a pain, but I’d rather just pay it.
The reason is that any time one needs credit approval, say you’re renting a place or buying a car, or you need a loan/credit card, ofc they always do a credit check and that bankruptcy could ruin your chances for getting things if a creditor doesn’t want to take a risk on you…but after 7 yrs it falls off from what I’ve read …though they still ask that question and some will lend to you, so don’t let it scare you off (I’ve seen it with a friend who did it).
I think in hindsight I made the smart decision not to file for bankruptcy because I doubt I would’ve been approved, say for my trading account, credit card, car loan, mtg, etc…if it was on my record.
So for whoever is reading this, weigh it out very carefully…each life is different, in my case I can handle it, but if you’re poor, struggling, then I’d suggest bankruptcy could be a good way out for you…esp if you’re younger, just do it, be debt-free, rebuild your life and credit. Check your laws in your state/nation…mine was for Canada.
Oh and if you did take that route, you’d very likely need a co-signer for big ticket items like loans and a house (mtg)…so if you don’t have family or friends who’d cosign, then it’s preferable to handle those debts yourself if possible.
yes, in canada. but for those in the USA, we’re screwed. u have no idea HOW pissed i am that my fucking parents immigrated to fucking USA. of all fucking places, USA is the worst!
I have estranged cousins in canada and they’re doing GREAT! way better than here in shithole USA. where it’s socialism for the wealthy and capitalism for the poor, aka BOOTSTRAP for the poor.
OH, and the country i was born in, is also doing GREAT. had we just fucking STAYED, i would have had a MUCH better fucking life. -_-
Ya it sucks being in the US, esp. if you’re not someone with money…basically all the nations with free health care tend to be the best places to live.
But politicians, esp. in Europe and Canada, have eroded the high quality of life we used to have before. Now because they opened the floodgates to fake refugees/migrants also legal immigrants, it caused rents and housing prices to skyrocket…put a massive strain on welfare and social programs and it’s basically made life very unpleasant here.
They’re also planning to increase property taxes to pay for their stupid decisions…but does anyone believe the landlords will eat that increase? They’ll put it on their rents, even though they’re enjoying the highest income from renting…it’s like a real life Monopoly game, and ofc the rich keep getting richer off the poor people’s backs.
So you are right that Canada is still better than the US, but not by a lot, esp after what the Liberals have done, they ruined a once great nation.
The ONLY way out of this mess is to have a high income and your own property…but good luck to us in the lower-to-middle class who don’t have our own homes yet.
Many people have left the major cities like the GTA and have bot homes elsewhere like the Atlantic provinces where houses are still affordable. My mom and I got ‘priced out of the market’ just as we were ready to buy a house or condo.
Now we have to wait for prices to come down or I need a job that pays at least double what I’m making now and/or find an s/o who wants to own also and has a stable job. That’s a major task on it’s own…finding a compatible partner.
i don’t begrudge anyone who had a good childhood or loving parents or grew up not in poverty. but life isn’t the same and the struggles aren’t the same. and ofc rich ppl can still be depressed. lots of rich or famous ppl kill themselves all the time.
“The one thing kids shouldn’t have to suffer through is low income and living in rental properties. It’s selfish and evil to bring kids into the world if a person can barely make ends meet…do the noble thing, either increase your income drastically first and then have kids or leave this world if you can’t break out of your lowly state in life. But people don’t think and the cycle repeats.”
>bc ppl are selfish fucks. it’s bc they want someone to take care of THEM when they are old, that’s why ppl have children. and having multiple children spreads the risk that your 1 kid won’t take care of you.
Yup sadly true…for some it’s a part of their culture and tradition…to have kids to look after you in old age and the kids are just willing slaves to this bad form of thinking.
I’d say the minimum is that at least they give the kids a home to live in if they’re going to do that…and preferably a nest-egg so they don’t have to worry about money…but ofc poor people don’t think of things like that, it’s all about making themselves comfortable at the expense of others (their kids).
Compared to many other kids, my siblings and I had a very good childhood, but it was by the teenage years we realized we were lower income and struggled to get by.
What made it much worse was my selfish, narcissistic dad who wanted to ditch us and form a new family. At the same time though he was a psycho at times and violent/abusive, so I’m actually glad he left us.
And while there are things I hate about my mother (nobody’s perfect), she sacrificed everything to keep a roof over our heads and it also allowed us to have a comfortable life as young adults and let us focus on our education.
Though I knew very early on about the disparity btw rich and poor….and I was furious at my parents for having kids when they really shouldn’t….but that just made them average humans, because they were mindlessly doing the same thing everyone else was.
It’s strange that despite all their suffering they never thought for a moment, “my life was and still is crap….I really shouldn’t bring kids into the world or they’ll have a bad life like I did.”
My dad used to tell me stories about how dirt poor his family was from their country and how they struggled…etc. I told him why did he not realize he shouldn’t have kids and he genuinely said he never thought about it before, the idea never occurred to him.
Most people are like dumb animals…they just reproduce because it feels good and to hell with the consequences or how badly your offspring suffers.
When I realized as a young kid that we were poor I knew we’d have a hard life…but I think kids are born to love life and be hopefully they can make a better situation…or maybe we just realized suicide isn’t easy and decided to try to make the best of our situation.
This brings me back to something I posted before, we just don’t have even the most basic standards, like an adequate income, to disqualify people from reproducing. There needs to be licensing and maybe when the collective herd wises up, we’ll get those standards, but it won’t happen overnight.
This is why everyone has to fend for themselves. We’re born in a bad life, try to make the best of it and if we can’t…then in the worst cases, we’re better off ending that wasted existence.
In my case I had a taste of the good life, but mostly it’s been terrible…while I think of myself as an intelligent person, I’ve also made a lot of dumb decisions…that’s because I had to be self-taught as my parents had little to teach me, esp. about Canadian culture.
If I wasn’t smart, didn’t have the good contacts and experiences that I did, there’s little to keep me here.
That’s why we see so many people that are homeless and living in tent cities. They’re the people that lacked a support network, didn’t have good job connections, had problems in their life that broke them. So I consider myself fortunate not to have ended up that way, but there’s no guarantee one’s life couldn’t get worse.
If it was in my power to eradicate poverty/homelessness, I’d do it in a heartbeat. The same thing is that those who have the power to fix this human catastrophe are completely out of touch.
They have their nice high gov’t salaries and cushy pensions and they never have to see these desperate people…instead they focus on their own pet projects like bringing in migrants from other nations that we don’t need, further exacerbating the housing crisis.
So ya in short, bringing kids into a world where they are loved, have safety, comfort, etc…is possible. But we need to have govt’s step in and manage who gets the privilege of having kids and who doesn’t.
Then we need to expand the euthanasia programs to children born into bad lives and want out.
Some people might be shocked by such a suggestion…ok do we have the billions of dollars it’d take to house, clothe, feed millions of poor kids?
If we don’t intend to take care of the poor, homeless, mentally ill then the least we could do is give people the opportunity to end a miserable existence.
But since even in Canada it’s tough to get approved for Maid, then most kids/people are largely on their own to find a means to pass away on their own.