I had a forgotten drunken one night stand years ago with a former coworker when i first had my psychotic break. Weeks later i noticed she had been doting over me and smiling like her first christmas whenever she seen me even though we we never close emotionaly atleast. Then one time we were working the same shift overnight and i noticed the baby bump. Not remembering sleeping with her then(xanax will do that) i chalked up her excitement at seeing me as horny pregnancy hormones or something. I seen her shopping two years ago with a guy i know and a young child thats visually comparibile to me with brown skin( the couple were former coworkers that happen to be caucasian)

This is just something ive been thinking about the past hour and putting together what i remember mentally. I feel like the most useless man ever but even if in the rare chance that is my child, i know that man shes with is a really good person. Oh man im not a good person