collective angst

I don’t know if that makes it better or worst, we’re suffering now, at least a few of us from the same thing. So we can at least comiserate.

but the pain is still too acute for me. I’m too vulnerable right now. So the intimacy scares me, not traditional intimacy but communal familial. I guess I’m waiting to be invited. New family member anxiety, and it’s a loose family. Subtlety was always something I had to work to understand.

I’m trying though. Every bit of my emotional experience is wiirrring away trying to figure out how to navigate this situation. But now I’m finding out theirs is too?

I don’t know how to relate to people this much. Are ya’ll joining me for donuts and coffee on Saturday too?! Geez lets just all get out our walking sticks and straw hats and set and talk a spell.

Not happening EVER! Such people like me don’t exist, don’t need to, I’m obsolete!

Which I guess is just my excuse to be alone. In the end. Everybody gotta have one.