You know you can’t hold me forever, I didn’t sign up for you
I’m not a present for your friends to open, this boy’s too young to be singing the bluuuuuuues
Just, this song is such a perfect stand in for where I am right now. Failed entirely by the promises of fame and fortune given in my youth. You can’t let me in your penthouse, I’m going back to my plow.
I finally decided my future lies beyond the yellow brick road……
No one here has the answers I’m looking for. I can’t get it here. So this is a location and lifestyle problem, not a being alive problem.
I wonder how many of you it is the same for, and you can’t see it. Maybe where you are is toxic like where I am. Toxic people eat up your soul, toxic companies, toxic communities. You can find little hold outs, and sometimes you can survive, but it stops being enough eventually.
I’m thinking about what @eternaldarkness was saying earlier about chances of recovery are. I think it depends a lot on being able to identify what makes a place and community toxic. I don’t claim to be any kind of expert, I just know my own personal hell very well.
So I think the thing to do is correct hard in the opposite direction, which is what I’m doing. I’ll let you guys know how that works out for me.