This movie was my awakening as a young man, the movie is called Hair from 1979 and it has an interesting relationship to the counter cultural movement. It is an idealistic picture of what the counterculture of the 1960s was based on my research. My parents didn’t find it very accurate. None of my family did. This was my teen rebellion, becoming bisexual and liberal.
I found somewhere to put my anger and passion that aligned with my values. At the same time behind the scenes the hook and reel were baited to pull me back towards conservative society; women suddenly found me exotic, specifically conservative women who wanted to fix me. I had trouble finding the attractive men I craved. Where I live most of them are conservative, or were then. I don’t regret not being young now and being able to carrous with the young gay and bi men available now…. who knows what is available in straight and bi women these days. I’ve always liked to have both available when single. I’m glad to be monogomous now.
Anyway, being bi, becoming more aligned with counterculteral values, even learning that there were countercultural values set me on the path I’m on now. I was already an outcast, I didn’t know it was a lifestyle that worked out long term. Eventually I learned about old hippies and strange people, and I was locked in, I wasn’t going to become conservative…….
It took so long for me to turn against the conservative upbringing, this entire part of the country has weird values. There are multiple buried cultures, and I just had to be told where to go dig, this movie helped. The protagonist is an Oklahoman, and I think that was important to me. My dad loved to travel to New York City when I was growing up, that was the central plot point of the movie him going to New York City.
People assumed I smoked cannabis but I didn’t try it until after my divorce. I didn’t find any moral failure in it prior to that, I just didn’t want the lung damage. However, once I started smoking, I figured in for a penny. The counter culture definitely pulled me into that, back when it was associated with that as a value.
The damage though, I probably wouldn’t feel as out of place, as depressed and as hopeless if not for the values this movie gave me. The joy it brought is something I miss, something I want to have again and I’m pushing so hard to get…… it leaves me tired and used up to the point I don’t see the point. Maybe they should put warning labels on these things, or an FBI disclaimer; “Warning young people watching this; IT will cause you to hope for a future that will take significant amounts of effort that will make you very sad, tired and sick down the line. You’re signing up for a world of hurt buddy, get ready!”
I probably still would have done it, I was a defiant little putz, but it would have been nice to start bracing myself, maybe put some money in some bonds so I can get out of this place sooner. I like to think I would have done some more prep work had I known.
Shoulda coulda woulda buddy
it’s a hard world out there
it’s not an easy world buddy
better just take care.
Peace and love, wishing you all peace and love
sincerely,
The Heartlessviking
1 comment
I grew up in a small logging town in Oregon and was in High School in the 70’s. We partied hard,Drank lots of alcohol, smoked lots of weed and did coke, mushrooms etc. We got in fights a lot and raced cars and crashed on occasion. Lost a lot of friends to drunk driving. I totaled 2 cars in HS myself but walked away untouched. Moved to Tahoe and after HS and did the same things but worked at a ski resort and I was playing in bands by then. I never really bothered with the conservative/liberal paradigm. I think most of us played both sides when it was convenient. Was never into politics, too busy with woman, cars, concerts and gigs. It was the 80’s of course. Life was about having fun and my rebellion was my long hair which my dad hated with a passion. Thats all I needed to do to piss him off to no end. Im still not really into politics much. I think we have a one party system of the greedocrats on both sides of the same bird. I thought we were bad morally but damn the kids today got us beat on that one. Still its sad to see so many cheer on all the wars and all the violence that the democrats like to call peaceful protesting. The Republicans love to see it so they can install their police state. They all claim to help us and then embezzle billions. Then they jack up our taxes. What a shitty world we now have. These kids are addicted to social media and politics I guess. No wonder so many are depressed now. My good days are behind me along with bad marriages and lost careers. Oh well.