Probably my own but with one change. After my mom left me for my dad in a new country, I was raised by relatives and finally no longer had to put up with her abuse and neglect. She never bought tissue or napkins for me to blow my nose for example, so my clothes were full of boogers during allergy and flu seasons. Wouldn’t even allow me to use the sink to clean up because she wanted to save on the water bill, and lied to me that cleaning up would only make my symptoms worse. I was not able to breathe through my nose so my maxilla bones, teeth, and jaw didn’t grow properly. She wouldn’t buy shoes when my feet outgrew old pairs, unless they became so small that the seams burst open. Eventually my toes became deformed as well. Whenever I got sick, she would tell me that I was a liability, making her life miserable etc, so I often had to hide my fever.
But my dad had to play the sorry card and said he missed me after all these years, even though it was his idea to leave in the first place. After visiting them (I was 11) during one summer, they refused to let me return to my home country. My chance for a normal life was thus gone.
I’d also say my own life. I wish I could travel back to when things started feeling bad with all the knowledge and information I have now so I have the power to do something about it. I fantasize about it a lot. Generally I’m agnostic but in the back of my mind I a part of me hopes I can start over with my memories entact.
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Probably my own but with one change. After my mom left me for my dad in a new country, I was raised by relatives and finally no longer had to put up with her abuse and neglect. She never bought tissue or napkins for me to blow my nose for example, so my clothes were full of boogers during allergy and flu seasons. Wouldn’t even allow me to use the sink to clean up because she wanted to save on the water bill, and lied to me that cleaning up would only make my symptoms worse. I was not able to breathe through my nose so my maxilla bones, teeth, and jaw didn’t grow properly. She wouldn’t buy shoes when my feet outgrew old pairs, unless they became so small that the seams burst open. Eventually my toes became deformed as well. Whenever I got sick, she would tell me that I was a liability, making her life miserable etc, so I often had to hide my fever.
But my dad had to play the sorry card and said he missed me after all these years, even though it was his idea to leave in the first place. After visiting them (I was 11) during one summer, they refused to let me return to my home country. My chance for a normal life was thus gone.
I’d also say my own life. I wish I could travel back to when things started feeling bad with all the knowledge and information I have now so I have the power to do something about it. I fantasize about it a lot. Generally I’m agnostic but in the back of my mind I a part of me hopes I can start over with my memories entact.