Hi SP. I typed out this letter to vent out everything with regards to a certain girl that I once, or rather still love. The names and certain facts have been removed, so that no other person can recognise me or her.
_____
Dear _____,
I remember the promise that we made to each other:We will never lie or say sorry to each other for we are friends.
I am afraid that I will have to break both parts of the promise: I am sorry because I lied.
I lied to you about being over the depressed period of my life, I lied to you that I do origami regularly,I lied to you when I said that my feelings for you we purely platonic, I lied to you when I said that I was happy you made up with him,I lied to you when last week you asked if I were fine.
During the 6 months where there was no him, no separation, just us, I was the happiest person in the world. Your persence was a breath of fresh air, sunlight peeking out after the night I had endured. For the first time, I wanted to help another person. I wanted to remove you from the thoughts of Him. I wanted you to be mine for ever.
I was not depressed before that, I was suicidal. The day I met you, I was going to end my existence. But, you….your presence in this world stoped me.
The last time we met in the real world, I joked about loving you.
It went like this I think:
Me: I Love you, _______
You: *Shocked face* What, I just made up with my boyfriend! I….
Me: *laughter*
You: What the heck?
Me: I cant beleive you thought I was serious. I just heard the good news from _____, congratulations on getting your boyfriend back.
You: Idiot, I thought you were being honest.
I lied to you that day. I was being honest, I did not know that you were back in your relationship, and I truly loved, no, I still love you.
Whenever I go on fb, I am afraid to scroll down for there may be one more photo of you and him, afraid to answer your chat. For now, seeing you in photos with him, hearing you talk about him feels like being stabbed.
I am not fine, _____. Since you went away, it feels that the drakness is even more dark, the pressure even greater.
I hope that you live out a long loving life. I hope that He never cheats on you again. I hope that………You’ll always be happy
Yours Lovingly.