im new here but my killing thoughts and death dreams been with me for a long time now! im a 12 years old girl that has many mood swings and problems but who doesnt!! ok my first reason why i wanna die, for years on end my friend has been getting bf’s 10 times a year! i know what your thinking you dont need love to be happy and why am i reading this and blah blah blah!!! if your reading this you gonna be crazy cause no one ever listens to me! you still reading?!? if you you want to then you better be ready for one heck of a ride!! as i was saying my friend got soooo many bf’s a year! i will never loved by anyone only my a kindergarned friend! in 5th grade i played runescape. it was so fun and you could have bf’s on there but its was nothing real it was fake and just for fun! school was a freakin’ drag so i played around on the computer, joking and pranking people! guys are soo stupid on there and would fall for any girl! i would get soo many bf’s and if two or three was on i would freak, i was with my bf when i was walking down this trail and ran into one of my other bf’s!!!! i logged off as quick as i can, i logged in two hours later to see they were still there!! they talked it out while i was gone and they both broke up with me! it was heartbreaking but a funny thing to me! after a couple years of playing on there i met a guy named Bigknight104, ok well i didnt meet him at first and i didnt know he was a guy either! my rl friend was on with her two friends memorymixer and bigknight104… we knew memorymixer was a guy but not bigknight!! my friend even told knight that she liked memory when knight liked her!!!! bigkinght suppostly said he asked me out the other day i was freakin’ out like omg this girl is asking me out!?! XD well blah blah blah i dont have much time you know its 3am here! XDD after a long time bigknight showed me this song saying this is what i think of you and your friend… the song was Lips of an Angel!! i loved the song but now i cry and break down when i hear it!! you see what happen i really fell for this dude… but he was soo crazy and got mad cause i had a tiny crush on his younger brother which was my age! he broke up with me but i begged him back then breakup and make up over and over and over!!! its like the song over and over from three days grace!! that once sweet song just kills me now but that isnt all my worse times! before that when my account was stoled and i never went back i met Doctor1 his real name is Donavan! omg we called each other and we only lived two hours away and we fell in love! my first bf!! at the time my friend jess fell in love with a guy named Randy over myspace and they only lived 20 mins apart!! those good days turned for the worse!! randy got mad and had that they had to break up cause it was long reationship distane(bad speller!) i was like come on dude you live 20 mins away from her!! me and donavan live two hours away from each other!! *shakes head* they broke up and soon donavan’s mother didnt let me talk to him anymore!! i never heard his sweet voice again… i tried jumping a cliff! i sprang my wrist but no one knew. it was heart breaking, bigknight… the guy i tried to keep in my arms forever and now donavan… my only happy thought ever?! never fun for anyone! jess tried not to be my friend i over dose myself and cut myself! oh the worse was the over dose!!
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5 comments
Hey 🙂 I know that you’re hurting now, but trust me, that’s no reason to kill yourself. No dear, it’s not that you dont need love to be happy. Everyone needs to be loved…it’s just like that. What you dont NEED though, is a boyfriend. Yes, ‘falling in love’ is fun and nice and all [i’ve been there tons of times], but it’s still just a WANT. There will always be people who will care about you, in different ways. Why are you searching so hard for someone to care about you romantically? I mean, really. I dont want to be too harsh or sound like a boring killjoy, but you’ve only been on this earth for 12 years. There’s a whole life ahead of you. What you’re in now…that’s not real love. I understand that you’re hurting, but, you’re so young. Im not sure you’ve given it some thought, but maybe you’re not ready for love. What you’re feeling now is most likely just INFATUATION…something you’d get over in a a year or 2 tops. You’ll look back at this one day and just laugh, trust me. Don’t hurt yourself over a boy or kill yourself over it…Give it some time and just focus on other things first , like school/extracurriculars maybe. Yes. it sounds nerdy. IDC. It works. Good luck to you~! And i hope this helped.
Hi. By the way i played runescape too 🙂 my combat was 90 hehe. Ok, i read your story, look you’re only 12 you don’t need a boyfriend right now, everything is ahead of you. Having 10 boyfriends a year i dont think is kool, something is wrong with your friend if she’s changing guys so many times. Focus on your education, set goals. I understand how you feel i was your age too, but suicide is not a way out, it’s not gonna help you. Ill tell u my little story.. Im almost 21 years old i only had 2 girlfriends, i dont know if ill have one anymore cuz i got in this bad situation that it’s really hard to get a gf for me right now…but it’s not the end of everything, i just focus on college continuing my education. I remember i had a girl when i was 13, right now it’s so funny to remember. Don’t think of suicide just cuz your friend got a bf and u not, you will have many guys, a whole life is ahead of you. I agree with Lala. Stay strong. Good luck. Enjoy your life! God bless!
Its kinda scary that you are 12 and meeting people in real life that you meet on RS. Its potentialy not safe and Its against the game rules because of this .
Try and keep rp seperate from rl cause bad shit can happen when the two mix. Kids get bashed bashed at school and such over stolen accounts and lost battles online.
Also scary that Andruha worked out what online game you play. Cause I cant see you mentioned it in your post.
Train hard, play safe and keep it fun.
Sorry I do see the game mentioned in you post
yo love does hurt, you can’t help fallen over guys that are complete idiots, (no offense but no nice guy would do that) just a hint, cyberspace isn’t the place to meet people, (unless ur like old which ur not) unless you meet the guy and get to know him, like really know him you’re not gonna feel real love…that feels like ur whole world, and you can’t stop thinkin about the guy. wanna talk?? aleshya.starry.girl@hotmail.co.jp