Well today I am 46 and life still sucks. Every night when I go to bed I pray I won’t wake up again, but again I wake up and the misery starts again. I’m tired of people telling me chin up things will get better. Well assholes nothing has gotten any better! I still feel unwanted and invisable to the world. My “friends” tell me how wonderful I am and that I will find the right person when I stop looking, if I stop looking how will I find this person?! Have they every been truly lonely in their lives? Do they know how the emptiness feels in the dark when you try to sleep? I’m sure they don’t.
I’m just so tired. Tired of living paycheck to paycheck. Tired of being taken advantage of. Tired of people telling me one thing and doing another. I’m tired of begging to see my granddaughter and having her kept from me. I’ve done nothing to deserve that. I’m just so tired.
3 comments
Other people are funny. not in the ha-ha kind of way, but in that they’re idiots sometimes. They have no idea what it’s like spending an entire weekend rolling around in bed, staring at various parts of the walls and ceiling, trying to glean some hidden knowledge that will get you out of the rut of depression.
Sorry that I don’t have anything better to say. I’m in a similar, alone all the time paycheque to paycheque, type of situation so I doubt that I could suggest anything to you that you haven’t already thought of. I find that money fills the hole inside quite nicely, so I’m slowly working toward (VERY slowly) financial independence. Easier said than done since all my free time is devoted to being in bed, but it’s something to work to at least. I highly recommend The Millionaire Fastlane. It’s a pretty great book that lays out the various job tracts and money making methods available these days.
Maybe il read that million dollar fast lane.. cause I’m in the same boat as you guys.. except those people tellin us we need change are actually right. Sleeping to much in bed is actually a bad descion we are making.. when during that extra couple of hours productive actions can be taken. I know our minds limit us, and seems as though other “happy” people are limitless.. only you, I, can change our lives for the better.. unless your a sexy model.. no millionaire is gonna come and take us out of our rut.
Sounds like me, expect I have no friends at all to tell me how wonderful I am. Oh well