My primary feeling of being in this world is horror and repulsion, my secondary feeling is devastating boredom. My reality is one mundane unglorious task after another until I’m dead. I’m barely managing to survive in this world of extroversion and expected positivity.
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I’m sorry to hear things arent great for you.
May I ask: have you always been bored/unenthused with life or is there anything you could try to alleviate it?
As for the horror and repulsion…I try not to dwell on it. I know its just burying my head in the sand but sometimes thats all i have to pass through another day. Because I agree that many things I hear of humans horrify and sadden me. Granted there is also much good in the world but there are many days I just want to be alone in my little world of darkness…
You should find what makes you happy and be you, not give out something you think is expected by others. I know its easy to say though…
You have a gift for writing. You describe your emotions and feelings with amazing clarity. I understand how you feel living in a world of extroverts.