It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything, so I doubt anyone remembers me, but whatever. I’m just really fed up with my existence, everything about me is just horrible. All I do is upset or annoy people, I somehow manage to peeve everyone I meet and I don’t remember the last time I made someone happy. I really can’t think of a single good thing about myself, I’m annoying, not very good looking, not very nice, completely talentless and I’m the most stupid person I know. I’m so stupid I’m actually failing most of my classes in high school right now, and I only passed the last semester with 52s in every subject. I also just really don’t like this world, there’s so much about it that I don’t like; everyone seems to be obsessed with sex (I’m an asexual so I find the topic uncomfortable to talk about), factory farms, toxins in plastic poisoning us and the earth, global warming, wars, and poverty just to name a few. I used to just hear about these things and not really think to much about them but now that I do I see how imperfect this world is. I just want to escape to the cyberpunk world that I always daydream about, and be the person I want to be. I just want to go somewhere exciting, where things happen and there’s such thing as adventure. I dunno, maybe I’ve just been playing too many video games. Fortunately there is a way out of this awful world, and this awful person who I am. God, this is starting to sound too much like a poem. Anyway, tonight I’m just gonna swallow a bottle Tylenol, hopefully it will be be enough to kill me. Hopefully this will make the people I annoy happier, I’m really bad at making people happy, but a lot of people hate me, so hopefully me being gone will cheer them up.
5 comments
Hey I remember you. I really hope you reconcider swallowing a bunch of pills. There is life waiting for you, beyond high school. I didn’t think so either when I was your age. Don’t give up just yet.
such catcat, bad idea forget the pills it will just make you sick and more miserable, yeah to bad about the worlds problems, but you can’t stop them and they are suppose to happen, mother nature will fix them in the end along with all of us, it’s hard to make other’s happy, all you can do is worry about making yourself happy, that’s easy, play video games and do what you enjoy.
1) Relying on other people to live a good life is a myth; yourself first, then the rest.
2) You write quite well, proof that you aren’t stupid.
3) Being asexual might be a plus. I’m quite asocial but sexual in nature, and honestly if there could be a strong anaphrodisiac available I would take it each other day in order to ease my life.
“Luck” is relative to your perception, so it is expected to go against your will at some point.
To accept that or deny that is not my choice.
The Tylenol won’t kill you, but you might have to spend a few unpleasant days in the psychiatric ward.
If you’re not doing so well in school, find a tutor. It can help.
I doubt you’re an awful person; you just sound a little shy and self-conscious. That’s normal, so try not to be so hard on yourself.
Yeah, this world indeed does suck, but there are good things about it as well. Focus on the positive and whatever brings you joy or peace. If you feel good it will be easier to have fun with others.
Tylenol will make you very sick and yes you will have to stay in a psych ward for a few days. I see nothing about you that indicates you being ugly, stupid, or otherwise.High school years can be pretty brutal but let it be a time of discovering who you are and what you want to do with your life. Look at the good things you have in life and focus on that. If you’re having a hard time in school make your teachers aware of that so maybe they can help you more to understand. As far as high school kids being obsessed with sex it doesn’t mean you have to be. Good for you if you don’t. This world does have some bad in it but there’s also some good. You just have to find it.