My family does things on weekends in autumn/winter and I don’t like doing them so I end up spending the entire day alone in my bedroom. I hate Sundays. I wish I had a friend to spend the day with. I literally wish I could hallucinate up a friend so that I wouldn’t be so lonely. I HATE being different from my family!!! My “mild OCD”: any idea what it is? I have to wash my hands a certain number of times and in a certain way, I have a bedtime ritual, I am compelled to find certain patterns with all numbers I see, it’s hard to read because I have to count words/sentences in patterns, and if I find a “wrong” pattern, I have to find a “right” pattern or I feel like a specific something bad will happen. I say “mild” because it’s not as bad as people with OCD have, and I have never been diagnosed (obviously) but it drives me insane because it makes it hard to do anything sometimes. IS it mild OCD?
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I’ve never struggled with symptoms of OCD, but from what you’ve described, it may be. But no one on here can tell you definitely, you should go see a doctor and tell them about it.
I can’t tell my family, much less a doctor. I have SUCH a hard time telling people things, even people I trust. I don’t know why. I feel guilty when I share personal things. Does that make any sense?