Some of you may know of the user named Kalmahavak. We met here on SP. We dated for two years. On Saturday, we has an argument and he called me some nasty names and I don’t know how to stop feeling how I feel right now. I’ve been in this tailspin ever since. My depression has been back for a while, but I honestly am in a place so dark right now that I want to end my life. It’s clear he never loved me and he has never respected me. I’ve attempted suicide five times since my birthday last June. He didn’t even remember me on my birthday. No present, no “happy birthday”. He didn’t even take time off work. He ignored me all day. And he does this all the time. I’m honestly feeling like I’m the crazy one, but I know intuitively I’m not the problem. Please, someone, take this pain away. I don’t want to feel like this anymore. My mind is so numb with pain that I can’t focus on my schoolwork. I haven’t eaten a decent meal in weeks, but since Saturday, I haven’t eaten much at all. I don’t go out with friends anymore because I lay in bed and cry. I want to end my life. I want to end this nightmare.
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2 comments
The end of a relationship is always hard. No one can just magically take that pain away. Even if things were going badly you still grieve for what you have lost. You just have to get through it. It gets easier as time goes by. You have to try to distract yourself. Its hard your mind wants to obsess and fixate on the pain. As hard as it might be you should try to go out with your friends and get your mind off of things. Throw yourself into your schoolwork.
Its only been a few days the only thing that will really help is time. Some people throw themselves right into a new relationship, trying to replace what they have lost and escape the pain that way. That is not a good foundation for a relationship though. Or even worse going back to the abusive relationship.
Yeah.. Life is depressing at times..
I remember being depressed.