Imagine what it would be like if the English language only had the word “fruit”, but no words to differentiate different types of fruit, like “banana” or “apple”? That would suck, right? Well, that’s how I feel about the word “suicide.” It’s a very frustrating word, because it’s so non-specific.
The way I see it, suicide can be divided into categories. Tell me what you think about the lines I’ve drawn. Am I off the mark?
There are three main forms of suicide: self-euthanasia, self-execution, and self-murder. From what I’ve seen, most are of the first kind, but the other two forms are not uncommon, and the categories can overlap.
Self-euthanasia is done out of a desire to escape your pain, whether physical or emotional.
Self-execution is done out of a desire to atone for, apologize for, or punish yourself for a wrong. It can also be done out of a desire to protect others from yourself.
Self-murder is done out of self-hatred, and the desire to kill the person that is the object of your hatred. While similar to self-execution, they are not the same.
As for myself, I’ve been all three, and I’ve probably even been all three at once, knowing me. I’m almost never one cohesive mind, and history shows that I can hold two contradicting thoughts at once very easily. Last night, it was a mix of 1 and 3. Mostly 3. The echoes of it are still bouncing around in my head.
What about you? Do you think my categories are accurate, and if so, which do you fall under?
8 comments
I think those 3 categories cover the bases, but there’s another extremely rare type of suicide where it’s for a cause. Like monks who burn themselves in protest, soldiers who throw themselves on grenades to save their platoon or… hate to say it but even suicide bombers. These people don’t necessarily want to die but they think their death can accomplish something bigger. Well that’s not me, I fall into the boring old self-euthanasia most days. Sometimes I want to die because I feel like my existence is a mistake but I don’t hate myself and I don’t want to punish myself, I just want to die so I can make room for progress.
I think I am primarily euthanasia, with shades of the other two creeping in from time to time. I really like your analysis of the three types
Thank you.
I fall under self-euthanasia.
I think that I’m self-euthanasia, though sometimes people make me unhappy. I never want to hurt anybody, but I feel like people can’t accept me. Now and days, it’s like people don’t wish me any ill will, but I’m not their type.
I once read that suicide is pent up anger, but because it is forbidden to kill someone else, we take out on ourselves. I feel angry sometimes, and if I’m a bad mood, then someone just calls me a *****, but when they in a bad mood, they’re just in a bad mood. LOL, can never win with people.
I am usually self execution and self murder. These reasons though can cause such pain that it’s unbearable, which can cross over to euthanasia. I’ve struggled with cutting and a lot of self punishment but I’ve decided that cutting is very very evil to me. So I’ve managed to not do it. I guess I have hit myself some, but even that is very rare. It’s weird, I don’t hate others, I manage to find something valuable in most, but I struggle with me. My soon to be ex just despises me and has been kind of abominable but I don’t even hate him. I just hate me.
Hmm. Maybe a fourth category is needed, whereby someone takes their life based on the pragmatic realization of the futility of not being able to get to where they want because of who they are. What would that be? Permanent self-extrication?
That and the first would be what I fall under, though I imagine that could be seen as a subcategory of the first. Ultimately this realization is almost, if not completely, certain to cause emotional pain – people are constantly in search of fulfillment, and the understanding that this is something unattainable for whatever reason is liable to fill one with a sense of emptiness (pun intended)