i’ve been suicidal since i was 14, maybe 13, but my memory before my first attempt is blurry. i’m almost eighteen now.
i didn’t intend on making it this far, at all. i didn’t intend on living this long – ever getting a job – making it to my senior year of HS.
but, if you’re like me. it’s probably important to remember something my friend said to me.
“you shouldn’t deem yourself a failure whenever you fall down again, you’re still going, you’re still strong. Your illnesses aren’t you. You’re you; and that’s what matters.”
just a little more, okay?
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It was blurry, almost ambient, but there lied a silhouette in the distance.
It’s called the Holy, Nether. It’s walls, have been broken, and rebuilt.
The message. To heal mankind.
Ah it is a hard knock life little one..
I like you did not plan to make it past my 18th birthday or to get a job. Oh I did not get a job just as I imagined but I did get arrested three times….
Yeah, there’s been a lot of times when I wanted to die, and I didn’t…
Simple thinga like finding a new game to get into meant a lot to me if I liked it well enough, but then things like school, work, my own family, and so on have dragged me down a lot, dealing with people.
On some level, things kind of got different rather than better or worse, but idk, nowadays I’m just really tired and lonely…