So I forget I am not allowed to type certain things on here but I am thinking that I am better off dead wish someone was allowed to kill me since I am not strong enough to do it myself.
Rebound as always which is awesome but still sucks that I am still alive when I want to die just not strong enough to do it myself.
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I don’t feel I’ve ever been too much of a burden on society but so called “society” seems to burden me to death .. mostly just demands I can’t meet and folks trying to own me like “custody battles” people I don’t like around every corner.. no dream of mine ever being avvomplishable . I don’t even act alive anymore I’ve given up all hope but it’s sad because just a few years back I never doubted any of my dreams .. now my dreams are twisted and have turned to something I would never want my life to be…. I was so sure of everything before this.
It’s a terrible awful life and nothing to live for anymore. I know how it is though because i don’t seem to be strong enough or at least I am but do not have correct tools to enable being fully capable… ive been trying for nothing other than to finish my life and complete my suicide wish for the last 12 years……… I have no family no friends no belongings no money no education no home only the really strong perserverence to end my life .. I fail time and time again but it’s all I hope for at this point
I also feel no obligation towards a society that I have never felt a part of, except to make enough money from temporary jobs to fund my adventures which is the only thing I have to live for anymore.
Still wish someone was allowed to kill me by assisted suicide, euthanasia, and mercy killing by a peaceful and painless way to go without repercussions on those who would help.
I know now I am not allowed to put my information on here but still what is the point of living is that whatever makes you happy will ultimately be destroyed in the end?
There is nothing in this world for me to live for what family, friends, community, society? Our system and our people and species we corrupt, destroy, exploitation and manipulate everything we interact with. Sorry for those who are in control of this system but not even you can get rid of suicidal thoughts death is the cure to life despite how scary it may seem depending on the situation.
You never want to post your personal info online. You could get robbed, beaten, kidnapped/tortured, etc. Also there isn’t anyone out there who’d want to assist you in suicide because that is illegal in most states-nobody wants to risk going to jail.
If you want to end your life it is not that hard, we can’t discuss methods here but you can easily Google the information. Believe me it wouldn’t even cost much money (or it’s free in some cases).
However if you have enough money to travel, then apply to countries like Holland which have legalized Euthanasia and they will take care of it, but only if you’re approved and I believe the rate is 10% (so pretty low chance of being accepted). Of course it’d be easier if you were already one of their citizens.
I think what stops most people including myself is the fear of botching the attempt. It’s a very valid concern because you don’t want to make a mistake and then survive with brain damage or paralysis. However if you pick the right method, then it’s nearly impossible to screw it up.
Every year in the US a million people attempt suicide and 45,000 succeed, meaning that it can be done. If I was extremely sure I wanted to end my life, I’d research everything I could, get my materials together, give away my stuff, write my suicide note and get on with it.
Life can be shit, I deal with my own set of issues every day, one of the worst is having family/friends that you can’t rely on. However, I still have some dreams I want to fulfill and I believe I can still succeed. The day I lose hope and know I won’t go anywhere, then I will definitely check out, but I’m giving myself another 5-10 years to see if I can turn things around.
When I was younger I had struggles but also great experiences that made life really worthwhile. Sadly I no longer have such experiences because I’m tight on money so I don’t go out much and it’s something I really miss doing, plus I’m out of shape.
So I’m just hoping to get a better income/get fit again and hopefully start living the way I always wanted to. If that doesn’t work then I have nothing more to live for but as I said I’m giving it another decade at most and then I’m done.
I thought about different methods and some might have a success right but naturally I rebound all on my own I don’t think I will ever truly kill myself despite knowing full well the longer I am alive the more I want to die depending on whatever I have looked into methods on how I just don’t want to botch the attempt I keep living for my own and family and friends sake I don’t have the resources to travel I live in the US sure I still continue on with life dealing with my ability to answer to myself meaning I talk to myself and draw attention to myself even when I don’t want to no I don’t hear voices in my head my thoughts are so powerful and being isolated in my apartment room makes walk around pacing and talk to myself which is bad enough and how I get judged and treated based on what I do and don’t do with is my own fault and also not my fault.
Only time I hear voices is I am high of weed.