I have a pretty good life, especially compared to most people. My dad’s rich. My mum’s poor. so i guess i’m somewhere in the inbetween. i get okay grades, and i have friends. my biggest complaints are well-deserved depression, shitty anxiety, and a semi-physical, but mostly verbally abusive stepmom. They think I’m a goody two shoes. I kinda am? but honestly, i wish someone would fucking notice when i just walk outside at night in the middle of a conversation and stay walking for long periods of time, or set fires in sewers, or do drugs cause hey free drugs are free. it just. nobody gives a shit anymore. i dont think they even know.
3 comments
Why use such freedom to hurt yourself? Why not embrace that freedom? Why not make yourself a nocturnal picnic and contemplate the stars?
So doing disruptive stuff isn’t getting their attention, what is their value system? What would get them to sit up and notice?
There’s a carrot and a stick, the only two methods of incentive. Give the desired response, reward. Give any other response (including apathy), negative consequences.
The problem (for me) with negative consequences is that they tend to spiral with negative responses. For example:
I have a dog that poops on the floor of her crate to get attention.
She knows I’ll smell it and do something.
If I yell at her, she gets scared and pees on the floor of her crate.
If on the other hand when she goes outside I praise her and give her affection, she messes her crate less.
I hate to demean humanity, but we just aren’t that much more complicated than that.
actually, fuck humanity.
I hope you can find someone in your life you can talk openly about these things with. Maybe explaining what you’re going through will make them understand. And does anyone know how your stepmom is hurting you?
Sorry, that’s just my two cents. Of course I don’t know the details of your situation.