Certainly anyone in your life that cares about you would be affected. In my case, I won’t end my life until I know a few people I care about will be fine if I’m gone. My life is pretty shit also (relatively speaking), it could always be worse, but I’m sticking around because there are still some things I enjoy about being alive.
I had a lot of potential when I was younger but I had a bad start in life (due to being from a low income family) so I missed out on a lot of things and I guess I’m trying to make up for that now that I’m an adult.
Still if I find one day that it is not longer worth it then I’ll end it. Some days I wish I could but I don’t want to go at this point. It’s just the crappiness of my life that makes me feel that way. I’m hoping once I’m doing better financially then everything else will fall into place, hopefully in the next few months.
I hear you and I’m sorry that your best friends passed away. Well one day all of us will be gone as well. Some might decide to go sooner and others might stay till the bitter end.
I just have some goals I want to fulfill first and then it’ll be out of my system. I’m also waiting for my mother to pass away before I do. While I’ve had my issues with her, she has always been there for me and is one of the very few people I truly respect and care about.
She’s also suffered as much as I have in life but stayed strong and got through it. While I didn’t ask to be her son, I’m glad I was. This is why I’ll try to hold on until at least she is gone first.
I had high hopes, I thought my life would really take off, but many issues got in my way and kept me down. It is fine to bounce around in your 20s and even 30s but by your 40s you should be settled (have a house, good job, wife, etc), but I’m still haven’t achieved that yet. Hopefully I will in the next few years.
All this suicide talk makes me realize how good it would be just to close my eyes one last time and never wake up again, like you said in your post above. I really wish I didn’t still feel a strong attachment to some people and this world because then ending my existence would be easier.
But the process of suicide is a real challenge on its own. However I’ve done enough research now on ways to go that I’m much more secure that there are means that are reliable, painless and reasonably fast.
All I really lack now is real determination to end it because of the things I love about life. There aren’t many but there are enough to keep me wanting to stick around at least another decade or so.
But to your point, do you really care if you’ll be missed by strangers? I know there is a part of us that wants to feel we’re known and loved by others but at the end of the day, the dead will be forgotten.
I remember when I was younger I was made to believe certain people were ‘important’ and I partly wanted to be ‘remembered’ for achieving something as well. But now I couldn’t care less. I’m happy for people like Einstein or actors who’ve done things that made them famous and loved by millions.
However it makes no difference to me. I know that I matter as much to strangers as they would matter to me which is not at all. We’re just humans who live and die and are forgotten. Billions came before us and will come after we’re gone. We just have this little moment in the Sun until we go back to being nothing again.
I just wish my life wasn’t one of being on the outside watching others having a great time while I was forced to miss out on most of it because of the shortcomings I had. I wish I had been born to more attractive parents who had wealth.
My life feels like a total write-off. A big waste of time, with nothing but suffering, loneliness and a longing to be doing better in life but never getting there. Not to mention, most of the people I was helpful to, talked shit about me and stabbed me behind my back.
You’d think that they’d realize their struggles were no different than mine and it’d bring us closer. Instead they chose to treat me like garbage after having taken advantage of me. Well of course they never got my help again after. Too bad so many people are shit.
By the way one other quick point about fame, it’s not what it’s cracked up to be. Just remember for all those who’d admire you, there would be just as many who’d despise you and cause problems in your life. Or you’d have stalkers and unpleasant encounters. I like my anonymity, I don’t want weirdos giving me issues wherever I go, as if I didn’t have enough problems in my life already. Sorry for the long post, I got carried away.
2 comments
Certainly anyone in your life that cares about you would be affected. In my case, I won’t end my life until I know a few people I care about will be fine if I’m gone. My life is pretty shit also (relatively speaking), it could always be worse, but I’m sticking around because there are still some things I enjoy about being alive.
I had a lot of potential when I was younger but I had a bad start in life (due to being from a low income family) so I missed out on a lot of things and I guess I’m trying to make up for that now that I’m an adult.
Still if I find one day that it is not longer worth it then I’ll end it. Some days I wish I could but I don’t want to go at this point. It’s just the crappiness of my life that makes me feel that way. I’m hoping once I’m doing better financially then everything else will fall into place, hopefully in the next few months.
I hear you and I’m sorry that your best friends passed away. Well one day all of us will be gone as well. Some might decide to go sooner and others might stay till the bitter end.
I just have some goals I want to fulfill first and then it’ll be out of my system. I’m also waiting for my mother to pass away before I do. While I’ve had my issues with her, she has always been there for me and is one of the very few people I truly respect and care about.
She’s also suffered as much as I have in life but stayed strong and got through it. While I didn’t ask to be her son, I’m glad I was. This is why I’ll try to hold on until at least she is gone first.
I had high hopes, I thought my life would really take off, but many issues got in my way and kept me down. It is fine to bounce around in your 20s and even 30s but by your 40s you should be settled (have a house, good job, wife, etc), but I’m still haven’t achieved that yet. Hopefully I will in the next few years.
All this suicide talk makes me realize how good it would be just to close my eyes one last time and never wake up again, like you said in your post above. I really wish I didn’t still feel a strong attachment to some people and this world because then ending my existence would be easier.
But the process of suicide is a real challenge on its own. However I’ve done enough research now on ways to go that I’m much more secure that there are means that are reliable, painless and reasonably fast.
All I really lack now is real determination to end it because of the things I love about life. There aren’t many but there are enough to keep me wanting to stick around at least another decade or so.
But to your point, do you really care if you’ll be missed by strangers? I know there is a part of us that wants to feel we’re known and loved by others but at the end of the day, the dead will be forgotten.
I remember when I was younger I was made to believe certain people were ‘important’ and I partly wanted to be ‘remembered’ for achieving something as well. But now I couldn’t care less. I’m happy for people like Einstein or actors who’ve done things that made them famous and loved by millions.
However it makes no difference to me. I know that I matter as much to strangers as they would matter to me which is not at all. We’re just humans who live and die and are forgotten. Billions came before us and will come after we’re gone. We just have this little moment in the Sun until we go back to being nothing again.
I just wish my life wasn’t one of being on the outside watching others having a great time while I was forced to miss out on most of it because of the shortcomings I had. I wish I had been born to more attractive parents who had wealth.
My life feels like a total write-off. A big waste of time, with nothing but suffering, loneliness and a longing to be doing better in life but never getting there. Not to mention, most of the people I was helpful to, talked shit about me and stabbed me behind my back.
You’d think that they’d realize their struggles were no different than mine and it’d bring us closer. Instead they chose to treat me like garbage after having taken advantage of me. Well of course they never got my help again after. Too bad so many people are shit.
By the way one other quick point about fame, it’s not what it’s cracked up to be. Just remember for all those who’d admire you, there would be just as many who’d despise you and cause problems in your life. Or you’d have stalkers and unpleasant encounters. I like my anonymity, I don’t want weirdos giving me issues wherever I go, as if I didn’t have enough problems in my life already. Sorry for the long post, I got carried away.