If you could restart, would you?
I have a debate with the voices in my head on this question. The reason I’m still alive is because I know I’ll be missed. I don’t know why they would miss me on some days. I find myself useless. But sometimes I think about how I am a survivor of all the bad times and all the times I wanted to hurt. I am a survivor to all the times I wanted it to end, of the times I was assaulted. I still stayed, and yes I look around and think to myself all the ways I could stop. Stop time, stop living.
So….If you could restart, would you?
2 comments
No. Once around is good for me. This life isn’t that rewarding, imo. Obviously struggle and suffering is inherent in our little system of living, and one lifetime of it is good for me.
I would not restart because now and only now do I understand that suffering has a meaning. I have also improved my life a lot these years. Yes, there were times in my life when life felt peaceful like my early childhood. But why to start again the same life? I also strongly believe in reincarnation and I know that life can start again. If only we could finish this life… and then receive our reward.