I’m going to hurt myself or someone else

I have been angry before. I’ve even had rage before. Never before tonight have I had the urge to hurt someone else. I held it down long enough to quickly escape to the shower where I released my rage on my face and the wall. I’m out now, I have two black eyes, a sore jaw, and multiple busted knuckles. It temporarily satisfied the monster inside me..I don’t know when it will come out again….