i cant find a place to hang. I was supposed to be normal, i just fixed myself she wont give me a break. I am going to go crazy. this isnt real. I woke up at the wrong time, i wasnt supposed to wake up, i woke up in the wrong world in the wrong body, this is jusyt a bad dream. I never knew this. If someone could recprd me. I wil nver remember what happened, I cant find a place to hang. the doorknob is too low, the rail of the bed soesnt work, cutrain pole tooo soft it curves in. I need it now. I need iit now. i am ready. I woke up, i should have never woke up, it woke up, thwe winter no IM not real , this isnt real,, no more any of this. Im going to wake up soon.my only regret is that i just fixed myself. I beat myself up just like i asked for. it worked. why do i smell the bakery shop near my elementary. I woke up wrong, this iwhere im supposed to be. I want to die, please. please. this isnt real. I will go, i dont i cant leave the room, almost like a ppsyc ward builrt fo r myself. she, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut uup. shut up, plastic cord dont speak. shut up, just shut up and go to sleep, kill yourself tomorrow, if it shut up.n im not real.It’s always my fault, do you want to kill me? do you want to take a hammer to my head? do you want to do that instead? you gave birth, i had to live within this, i remember what it was like now. i remember what happened last winter now. I woke up in , stop lying. i should have never woke up, i shouldnt have woke up, i shouldnt ahev woke up, does anyone have the fetish or the desire to, shut up, shut up. i am  not, am i i.??????I have worked so hard to put it into, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry sorry, my words, my throat my head wont let me speak. just die. i cant die. go back to thinking that. it is just a bad dream