I fucking hate high school. Everyday I watch couples walk down the hallway, hand-in-hand. I watch people laugh and play with their friends, while I sit in the corner sad and alone. I haven’t improved at all. I’m still a socially awkward weirdo with a god awful stutter. All the other kids that were shy in middle school have big friend groups and boy/girlfriends now. Me? I have nothing. I’m still the same lonely failure I was in middle school. I don’t know why I thought this year was going to be different. I did nothing to improve myself and now it’s too late to make any new friends because everyone’s already found their cliches. I’m giving up at this point. Nothing will ever change for me. I’m going to die alone.
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Once the end of Senior year rolls around, all of the cliques that you’re seeing will disappear. People will move away for college.
Cliques don’t really exist much in Adulthood. Sure, you’ll see it at work sometimes, but none of those people really go out and spend time with each other outside of work. I had a ton of friends in high school, and I haven’t seen a single one of them in maybe 10 or 15 years. Understand, while you’re in high school, your life hasn’t even truly begun yet. You’re still incubating, so to speak.
In your situation, now that I know what I do being in my 30’s, I would forget about making friends entirely and just focus on improving myself. Exercise, college applications, extra curriculars. You aren’t a loser for having a lack of friends. Failure doesn’t mean you’ve lost–you’ve only truly lost once you stop trying. Absolutely focus on self-growth. Forget everyone else.
“Team Fearless” and “Coach Pain” are motivational channels I like listening to on YouTube. I recommend checking them out.
Be who you are, and cherish it.
Thank you for reminding me of the value of my own life.
i feel the same, it feels like life is passing by me without things like friends or any sort of comfort. where is my high school drama? where am i supposed to be on his hierarchy? i’m going to graduate soon, so is it too late to even try and find any friends?
i’ve gave up some time ago when i embarrassed myself at my first club. i really tried making friends this time, i really did, but i was a failure, i always am.
but people are still out there willing to be found and talked to, we all need to find them. this cage of solitude hopefully won’t last forever..