Glory days

Lately I’ve had this song stuck in my head, which is kind of impressive for me since I collect catchy songs;

I’ve been realizing I can’t spend my life reliving college. I have no idea where this song came from in my life since it came out before I was born in 1985. My parents didn’t particularly listen to Bruce Springsteen. My best guess is summer camp, we listened to a lot of cheesy Americana back then.

Anyway it sat half remembered in the back of my brain until last week. I was watching Bruce belt out one of my all time favorites Cadillac Ranch. He was dancing around with his guitar like a man posessed. I was talking about it elsewhere today; you’ve got to engage with life hard. Bruce does it. He’s still alive, singing his songs,  I guess his glory days never ran out.

I talk to a lot of people who are at the end of their glory days, retired people. I have a special place in my heart for them, they’re like me.

It’s not that I won’t see glory again. It won’t be these days that I talk about is all. I enjoy having that foreknowledge. Sometimes you get that sort of top down, I’m going to be thinking about this til I’m dead….. and sometimes you get that I’m going to forget about this as soon as I’m out.

I didn’t realize the first verse was about baseball. I’m a terrible sports person in almost every regard. Football, baseball, basketball, team sports and me only sort of got along. I wanted to be good at baseball, but I wasn’t. I was always left field, and never designated hitter.

So this sensation, of looking in on people who’s glory days were their teen years…… it’s such a huge part of my life. I’ve been in my prime for the last decade or so, my teens sucked. The only reason I made such a dumb decision as to marry the woman I did was because I was drunk on the power of having choices in my life again.

I’ve been thinking about my time working at the hospital too, and as a field tech, those were glory days too. I have terrifying stories to tell, knowledge about systems that most people never think about. What’s glory if not that?

I guess that’s the upshot of my life now. I still know a lot about systems that most people haven’t a clue about. I still get a bit of near daring  do, but it doesn’t come close to where I’ve been.

All the adventure went out of life somewhere around five years ago. I kept trying to recapture it, but it wasn’t going to happen. Now I think about leaning in, living in now, forget the glory days, make today the best it can be. I haven’t worked it out yet.

My former best friend also matches the description of the girl in the song, she was hot stuff in high school, and when we met. Last I saw her she was not doing so hot. I don’t know what’s going on with her.