So yesterday I was complaining about how I just wanted something to happen already. Well something did. They’re offering me that crappy technician job in Austin that I didn’t want to interview for. The one with stripping cars all day long. The finger on the monkey paw curled. I’m trying to figure out which is worse. McDonald’s or technician job. I know I don’t want to do either. Technician job pays more (by like a handful of dollars an hour) and gets me away from my family. I don’t want to do either. But technician job might be my job for the next few YEARS depending on how things go. I guess I could say the same thing about McDonald’s. I have actual engineering jobs I’m interviewing for. Not exactly excited about them, but they blow the other two options out of the water in terms of what they pay. And they’re actual engineering work. The thing is do I want to gamble and bet on me getting one of those? Because if I stick with McDonald’s and end up not getting those either, I’m stuck with McDonald’s. If things go well today will they try to offer me a job on the spot? What do I say in that instance? Man nothing feels right. I’m too fucking depressed to do anything. I just wanted to go into the PhD program, but I’m fairly certain I’m not even supposed to be there either. If the monkey paw was going to curl, couldn’t have it made it a bit more interesting of a choice?
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Hey man at least some of your jobs are calling you back. Sorry if I’m a bit bitter, the job market sucks. I’m not at the point where I can force myself to look at options that unpleasant, I don’t envy your choice.
I’m supposed to have a job coach, haven’t heard from her in a month. I applied for the one job I could stand to, haven’t heard back from them. I’m supposed to be doing this contract gig, never got anything out of that.
I mean next year I’m going back to grad school(in theory) and hopefully there will be an assistanship with that, but that’s next year, in the fall. I want to actually do something between now and then.
But if you just have to have something, it seems probable that something is going to be crap. I mean if it already looks bad on the outside that’s a really bad sign. The stress cracks on my last real job started showing a few weeks in, and I knew it was too good to be true.
However if I knew when I was applying, I probably couldn’t have pushed. It was just the momentum that I already had the job, they were already going to pay me and I wanted that money. Get out before you get to that point if you can. Bad companies are counting on you getting in too deep and then you’ve got another black mark on your record. Two now I’ve got because I was too kind hearted and greedy.
Never again I’m saying, if I see the corrupt underbelly of a company I’m walking away. They can find someone else to ruin the career of, to fire because they can’t run a company. That mainly applies to this last one. You could end up in some rural shithole having to pay for your own gas, use your own vehicle, in debt on a job trying to make money on a dead end job, it’s happened to me.
Texas isn’t THAT much different than Oklahoma. From what I hear sometimes it’s worse.