One of my mother’s favorite things to say to me when she’s angry at me: “I almost aborted you, but I didn’t.” Like I’m supposed to be thankful for that. I wish she had aborted me. I don’t think I was meant to be born.
Narcissistic mothers (or parents in general) are very damaging, but unfortunately, society doesn’t have a test for becoming a parent. I think my mother was narcissistic but, not on that level, it is sort of more believable tho when it’s more coverted. Anyway, I believe one can heal from it but, it’s a long journey. At least you seemed to have identified the issue, now you need to figure out how to heal from it. You can try the Jeffrey E. Young schema based therapy. My psychologist had me fill up like 240 questions, and it turned up matching 96% on the emotional deprivation schema. I am guessing you should have similar results.
“unfortunately, society doesn’t have a test for becoming a parent”
>>they should. If we need to have a license to drink, drive, or smoke weed, then at the bare minimum we need a license to pop out babies.
There are SO many ppl having kids that shouldn’t. Just one glance at the news and you’ll see so many unfit parents. Not even the narcissistic ones- the ones in the news literally don’t feed the kids and starve them to death, or beat them to death, or throw babies from balconies. I don’t even want to mention the latest horrific stories bc they’re that bad.
And no, it’s not a “few rare cases” anymore. Or a “few bad apples.” The whole cart and apple tree are rotten. A huge swatch of unfit people are having loads of babies. And the poor babies grow up to be depressed af adults with miserable lives.
Very few children of abusive parents- and that includes verbal abuse- grow up to be happy well adjusted adults.
97% of us are scarred for life. And end up on sites like SP.
It will never happen, but I personally think ppl should be required to have a license to have babies and to pass tests demonstrating they are capable of being good parents. With semi-annual check ins.
I don’t know about you, but I’ve watched so many child Abuse documentaries- and no, CPS barely does anything, and 99% of the time too little too late.
There are MILLIONS of kids being born and grow up in horrible abusive environments. The vast majority are never ever reported.
And that’s not even including the narcissistic ones that verbally and mentally beat down their kids.
Unhappy parents create unhappy kids who grow up to be depressed and unhappy in the vast majority of cases.
These irresponsible and shitty parents create kids who become Karen’s and Ken’s. Or serial killers. Most serial killers or violent offenders grew up in abusive homes.
Violence breeds violence. Incompetent shitty parents create unhappy emotionally unstable unhappy children who become scarred for life.
Best way to break that cycle is to stop letting shitty ppl pop out more kids.
It can start with something as simple as someone with documented abuse not allowed to have any more children.
Just like someone with a criminal history is not allowed to have guns.
So many documented- not even all but JUST the ones already proven to be abusive by CPS- continue to have more children that they abuse. These ppl have CPS called over and over again with NOTHING being done until the child dies or phases out of 18 so they’re no longer a part of CPSs problem.
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Same here. It would’ve saved me a LIFETIME of pain and trauma.
Narcissistic mothers (or parents in general) are very damaging, but unfortunately, society doesn’t have a test for becoming a parent. I think my mother was narcissistic but, not on that level, it is sort of more believable tho when it’s more coverted. Anyway, I believe one can heal from it but, it’s a long journey. At least you seemed to have identified the issue, now you need to figure out how to heal from it. You can try the Jeffrey E. Young schema based therapy. My psychologist had me fill up like 240 questions, and it turned up matching 96% on the emotional deprivation schema. I am guessing you should have similar results.
Be well
Did that type of therapy help you? In what ways?
“unfortunately, society doesn’t have a test for becoming a parent”
>>they should. If we need to have a license to drink, drive, or smoke weed, then at the bare minimum we need a license to pop out babies.
There are SO many ppl having kids that shouldn’t. Just one glance at the news and you’ll see so many unfit parents. Not even the narcissistic ones- the ones in the news literally don’t feed the kids and starve them to death, or beat them to death, or throw babies from balconies. I don’t even want to mention the latest horrific stories bc they’re that bad.
And no, it’s not a “few rare cases” anymore. Or a “few bad apples.” The whole cart and apple tree are rotten. A huge swatch of unfit people are having loads of babies. And the poor babies grow up to be depressed af adults with miserable lives.
Very few children of abusive parents- and that includes verbal abuse- grow up to be happy well adjusted adults.
97% of us are scarred for life. And end up on sites like SP.
It will never happen, but I personally think ppl should be required to have a license to have babies and to pass tests demonstrating they are capable of being good parents. With semi-annual check ins.
I don’t know about you, but I’ve watched so many child Abuse documentaries- and no, CPS barely does anything, and 99% of the time too little too late.
There are MILLIONS of kids being born and grow up in horrible abusive environments. The vast majority are never ever reported.
And that’s not even including the narcissistic ones that verbally and mentally beat down their kids.
Unhappy parents create unhappy kids who grow up to be depressed and unhappy in the vast majority of cases.
These irresponsible and shitty parents create kids who become Karen’s and Ken’s. Or serial killers. Most serial killers or violent offenders grew up in abusive homes.
Violence breeds violence. Incompetent shitty parents create unhappy emotionally unstable unhappy children who become scarred for life.
Best way to break that cycle is to stop letting shitty ppl pop out more kids.
It can start with something as simple as someone with documented abuse not allowed to have any more children.
Just like someone with a criminal history is not allowed to have guns.
So many documented- not even all but JUST the ones already proven to be abusive by CPS- continue to have more children that they abuse. These ppl have CPS called over and over again with NOTHING being done until the child dies or phases out of 18 so they’re no longer a part of CPSs problem.