🙂 Distant…always the kidder 🙂
Lyda..i feel this way because i guess i really be noticed by people. And i dont mean noticed like popular and stuff cause i already have that..i mean noticed as in the real me. The depressed and lonely and in need of help me. =/ I give people hints..but like Ellachristina said, if people dont want to see, they dont see.
I know what you mean Alicia.:( I’m not really the kind of person who suffers in silence.(Lol) I’ve learned through out my life that if i don’t scream and stomp my feet about it,nobody else cares enough to do anything or even notice me or that i’m suffering.people prefer to ignorant,if they don’t want to see something,they don’t. and you know,it’s probably because they love you. that might be a weird concept,but what i mean is-if someone I love is suffering and I can’t help in any way,i think it’s normal to wish it away.does that make sense?sometimes it can feel like your sitting in the middle of the room screaming and no one even looks up at you.sometimes it makes me really sad because i feel like,shouldn’t the people I love care enough about me to notice when something is wrong? like,why should I have to spell everything out for them? 🙁 but we’re all here for you. hang in there,your definitely not alone in feeling this way sometimes. I hope things get better for you.
Ellachristina, exactly…thank you for understanding. I dont wanna scream and stomp my feet per say cause then i’ll just look like im complaining..so i do suffer in silence. Im so ready to explode on people though :/
lol,i try not to too…i just learned at a young that if I didn’t speak up and make someone hear me..they wouldn’t. but I usually only get really upset when i’m desperate…I bottle it up kind of,and then it gets to the point where it’s just too much.i’m shy normally,and hehe…I don’t literally stomp my feet anymore,although,maybe it would help? sometimes other things help release some of the stress though,running is my lifesaver. my cousin paints. whatever helps you to cope in a healthy way and express yourself so those feelings don’t bottle up to the point where it’s way too much and you feel like your in way over your head. music is good too,or journaling..really any creative outlet. don’t give up! I really believe in using our suffering to help others and create something beautiful rather than letting it defeat us. you seem really nice. I bet you can help a lot of people. 🙂
Oh 🙂 thank you. I dislike running…very much. But my trainer forces me…which brings me to my so called creative outlet. I box…and i do take my anger out in the ring. Sometimes..i hurt people really bad though..and more recently, i havent had time to box because of work and school..and i just found out im pregnant so i have to quit soon..so now im becoming frustrated with everything. 🙁
Distant..its hard to work around these people 🙁 I do my best though..it just isnt good enough
No exploding, Rain… First, I don’t want the rain to become a tornado… Second, more seriously, you don’t deserve it. If there are people in your life who are causing you grief, work around them. Don’t let them get in your way.
Increase your efforts, Rain… I’m not suggesting that you walk around being a (expletive). I am suggesting that you stand up for yourself… and if people don’t respond to the nice way, the less-than-nice-way, the borderline-mean way, etc…. Then you gotta do what you gotta do. You need a few things on this planet… food, air, and shelter among them. Anything else you don’t need… So if someone isn’t providing food, air, or shelter… they can go for a long walk and disappear.
You’ll make an awesome mommy… Your heart is in the right place and you have a sense of conviction. Although you’re not boxing now, you will again… As long as everybody wears the protective gear, no harm… and I hope people stay on your good side so they don’t get on the wrong side of you in the ring. 🙂
Gahh Distant..when you say i’ll make an awesome mommy, i feel pressured to be a mom. I dont want to be a mom..you know why from previous conversations we’ve had…this mommy thing is killing me. I really do want to explode…i cant take this for too much longer
I hated it at first too,but I love being able to push myself. boxing is so cool! 🙂 I wish I could,you would probably squish me like a bug though,lol,i’m not particularly strong.:) it is a dangerous sport though.
Congrats!! idk how your feeling about it,but I think a baby is always a beautiful thing. My friend is a single mother who had her daughter last year,it was our senior year in hs. she was afraid at first,and it’s a really challenging thing being a mom. but once her daughter was born-she is her whole life. If you choose to keep your child,I believe you would be a good mom. that doesn’t mean it’s always easy,and Idk your age? but ultimately it’s about what is best for you and your child. like i said before-you seem like a good person and really smart. you’ll get through this,whatever your choices are.
I definitely don’t want to pressure you, Rain… Not at all. I think you should decide what you need to decide… for the health and welfare of everyone involved. Perhaps I should have said WHEN YOU’RE READY to be a mom, you’ll make an awesome mom. I’m sorry if I mis-phrased that.
Deep breaths… walking… and talking about it… Please don’t explode… You’re too valuable to let others get the best of you. That’s not fair to you.
I know you dont mean to. Its just that when someone tells me i’m a great athlete, i have to prove them right even if it kills me. If someone tells me im smart, i have to prove them right even if i lose sleep studying. *sigh* I’m scared and have no support. The baby’s father wont even listen to me..and he and two of my best friends are the only ones that know and theyre all pressuring me to keep it..they tell me im gonna have the cutest baby in the world..i feel like i need to have the cutest baby in the world..for them…I have a problem..You need to email me :[
have you looked into our options? is the father involved? you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,it’s okay. I think adoption is one of the most amazing things there is. abortion is also an option,depending on your personal feelings and views. it’s your life,and your choice. I would say-do whatever feels right to you.
Gahh the baby’s father..he tells me to keep it when he’s not angry at me..but then again we just got into a fight earlier where he said that he hoped i got out of bed and fell on a knife..that he didnt want anything to do with my bastard child…his views are mixed
I understand… I have a competitive instinct inside of me, too… I feel the same way much of the time. Ultimately, you and only you can make the decision that you need to make about this. Your welfare… and the baby’s welfare… are at stake. That’s a huge decision and people should respect whatever you decide to do. Period.
Rain… Please don’t define your entire being and existence in that way. That’s not accurate. Yes… You have issues and challenges you’re facing… and they can be significant and overwhelming. I understand that… I’m on this site, too. You’re so much more than that…. Try not to forget that. As for the father, I won’t judge him… Honestly, I wish him the best… because I think if he could adjust course then everyone around him, including you, could benefit in some way. So I have to hope.
Those moments where you want to break down crying and cut yourself
When you need to talk to someone so you go through your contacts list
and you call the people closest to you, the ones that said they would always be there
But…no one answers…they forward your call to voice mail…the ones that answer say they’re all to busy.
22 comments
If someone is ignoring you, just RAIN on them…. maybe even a THUNDERSTORM!
😉
🙂 Distant…always the kidder 🙂
Lyda..i feel this way because i guess i really be noticed by people. And i dont mean noticed like popular and stuff cause i already have that..i mean noticed as in the real me. The depressed and lonely and in need of help me. =/ I give people hints..but like Ellachristina said, if people dont want to see, they dont see.
Lol damn I wish I came up with that one Distant!I’m not iqnorinq you,why do you feel that way?
lol… It came to mind, lifeishorrible… Sometimes, the witty part of my brain works. 🙂
Haha we should have names like that riqht?I like yours tho,It’s Instristinq.
I know what you mean Alicia.:( I’m not really the kind of person who suffers in silence.(Lol) I’ve learned through out my life that if i don’t scream and stomp my feet about it,nobody else cares enough to do anything or even notice me or that i’m suffering.people prefer to ignorant,if they don’t want to see something,they don’t. and you know,it’s probably because they love you. that might be a weird concept,but what i mean is-if someone I love is suffering and I can’t help in any way,i think it’s normal to wish it away.does that make sense?sometimes it can feel like your sitting in the middle of the room screaming and no one even looks up at you.sometimes it makes me really sad because i feel like,shouldn’t the people I love care enough about me to notice when something is wrong? like,why should I have to spell everything out for them? 🙁 but we’re all here for you. hang in there,your definitely not alone in feeling this way sometimes. I hope things get better for you.
Ellachristina, exactly…thank you for understanding. I dont wanna scream and stomp my feet per say cause then i’ll just look like im complaining..so i do suffer in silence. Im so ready to explode on people though :/
lol,i try not to too…i just learned at a young that if I didn’t speak up and make someone hear me..they wouldn’t. but I usually only get really upset when i’m desperate…I bottle it up kind of,and then it gets to the point where it’s just too much.i’m shy normally,and hehe…I don’t literally stomp my feet anymore,although,maybe it would help? sometimes other things help release some of the stress though,running is my lifesaver. my cousin paints. whatever helps you to cope in a healthy way and express yourself so those feelings don’t bottle up to the point where it’s way too much and you feel like your in way over your head. music is good too,or journaling..really any creative outlet. don’t give up! I really believe in using our suffering to help others and create something beautiful rather than letting it defeat us. you seem really nice. I bet you can help a lot of people. 🙂
Oh 🙂 thank you. I dislike running…very much. But my trainer forces me…which brings me to my so called creative outlet. I box…and i do take my anger out in the ring. Sometimes..i hurt people really bad though..and more recently, i havent had time to box because of work and school..and i just found out im pregnant so i have to quit soon..so now im becoming frustrated with everything. 🙁
Distant..its hard to work around these people 🙁 I do my best though..it just isnt good enough
No exploding, Rain… First, I don’t want the rain to become a tornado… Second, more seriously, you don’t deserve it. If there are people in your life who are causing you grief, work around them. Don’t let them get in your way.
Increase your efforts, Rain… I’m not suggesting that you walk around being a (expletive). I am suggesting that you stand up for yourself… and if people don’t respond to the nice way, the less-than-nice-way, the borderline-mean way, etc…. Then you gotta do what you gotta do. You need a few things on this planet… food, air, and shelter among them. Anything else you don’t need… So if someone isn’t providing food, air, or shelter… they can go for a long walk and disappear.
You’ll make an awesome mommy… Your heart is in the right place and you have a sense of conviction. Although you’re not boxing now, you will again… As long as everybody wears the protective gear, no harm… and I hope people stay on your good side so they don’t get on the wrong side of you in the ring. 🙂
Gahh Distant..when you say i’ll make an awesome mommy, i feel pressured to be a mom. I dont want to be a mom..you know why from previous conversations we’ve had…this mommy thing is killing me. I really do want to explode…i cant take this for too much longer
I hated it at first too,but I love being able to push myself. boxing is so cool! 🙂 I wish I could,you would probably squish me like a bug though,lol,i’m not particularly strong.:) it is a dangerous sport though.
Congrats!! idk how your feeling about it,but I think a baby is always a beautiful thing. My friend is a single mother who had her daughter last year,it was our senior year in hs. she was afraid at first,and it’s a really challenging thing being a mom. but once her daughter was born-she is her whole life. If you choose to keep your child,I believe you would be a good mom. that doesn’t mean it’s always easy,and Idk your age? but ultimately it’s about what is best for you and your child. like i said before-you seem like a good person and really smart. you’ll get through this,whatever your choices are.
I definitely don’t want to pressure you, Rain… Not at all. I think you should decide what you need to decide… for the health and welfare of everyone involved. Perhaps I should have said WHEN YOU’RE READY to be a mom, you’ll make an awesome mom. I’m sorry if I mis-phrased that.
Deep breaths… walking… and talking about it… Please don’t explode… You’re too valuable to let others get the best of you. That’s not fair to you.
I know you dont mean to. Its just that when someone tells me i’m a great athlete, i have to prove them right even if it kills me. If someone tells me im smart, i have to prove them right even if i lose sleep studying. *sigh* I’m scared and have no support. The baby’s father wont even listen to me..and he and two of my best friends are the only ones that know and theyre all pressuring me to keep it..they tell me im gonna have the cutest baby in the world..i feel like i need to have the cutest baby in the world..for them…I have a problem..You need to email me :[
have you looked into our options? is the father involved? you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,it’s okay. I think adoption is one of the most amazing things there is. abortion is also an option,depending on your personal feelings and views. it’s your life,and your choice. I would say-do whatever feels right to you.
Gahh the baby’s father..he tells me to keep it when he’s not angry at me..but then again we just got into a fight earlier where he said that he hoped i got out of bed and fell on a knife..that he didnt want anything to do with my bastard child…his views are mixed
I understand… I have a competitive instinct inside of me, too… I feel the same way much of the time. Ultimately, you and only you can make the decision that you need to make about this. Your welfare… and the baby’s welfare… are at stake. That’s a huge decision and people should respect whatever you decide to do. Period.
I e-mailed you…
Ah..good advice. The baby..my baby. A life that doesnt deserve to be brought into a life where it has a suicidal mother and a deadbeat father..ugh
Rain… Please don’t define your entire being and existence in that way. That’s not accurate. Yes… You have issues and challenges you’re facing… and they can be significant and overwhelming. I understand that… I’m on this site, too. You’re so much more than that…. Try not to forget that. As for the father, I won’t judge him… Honestly, I wish him the best… because I think if he could adjust course then everyone around him, including you, could benefit in some way. So I have to hope.
Does anyone ever feel ignored…I do.
Those moments where you want to break down crying and cut yourself
When you need to talk to someone so you go through your contacts list
and you call the people closest to you, the ones that said they would always be there
But…no one answers…they forward your call to voice mail…the ones that answer say they’re all to busy.
Nobody knows me but I’m always there
A constant reminder of a world that doesn’t care