Nothing

Nothing, that’s what I am, and that’s what I feel.  I may be breathing but, I am not living.  Nothing that I ever do is ever good enough for anyone, and it never will be.  For years I used to blame those that were around me for the way that I am, but maybe all along it has only truly been me.  Maybe the beatings, the abuse, the hatred that others always directed at me was never really their fault, perhaps the blame should have been pointed at me all along.  There is no reason for me to live, everything that I have ever held dear to my heart, has been torn to shreds.  I should not exist, nor do I deserve to exist.  I walk through life unnoticed for the most part, if I cry no one cares, if I hurt people turn away.  In every aspect of my life I am truly and utterly nothing, whether it be on here, or in reality my presence is neither desired nor wanted.