I find it more than appropriate that there are sites online that provide ready-made suicide letters. I think its the best way to express to the world that they don’t deserve any more effort…a little bit of reciprocity for the absolute cold and apathetic way the world treats its members. In just a few minutes I can google a suicide note generator, and not even have to give fucking people one extra fucking minute of thought. I’m done with them. im done with not fitting in  and being awkward. Im done with being fucking ODD. I’m done existing in this fucking shell that keeps me […]
Aymira1
I know that I will always feel alone in this place. Just an odd number, either nuts or an embarrassment or someone to bullshit for an easy distraction. I want to curl up under my heated blanket, pull out my only true friends ( books) and for one minute forget that I am so alone in this monotonous, bullshit, cruel fucking world. I have completely given up on believing in a loving and powerful deity. I can’t believe it, but its true. 27 years of believing in religion and purpose and fate and love and everything falling into place just as it should, only to […]
I made her a promise. Its one that I knew I couldn’t keep no matter how hard I try. But its what she wanted to hear and I wanted some way to soothe her mind and comfort her fears. The metal laying next to me calls my name, whispers that in one second it could all be done. No more pain. No more suffering. No more loneliness. Just nothing. Nothing…mmmm…. feels like a warm blanket. it keeps calling me. I never knew a body could endure so much and not give out. A childhood game of mercy where a person is told to never say […]
4 years later and I’m still learning how to breathe underwater. I can’t keep living with this constant unending pain. Learning how to walk without one of your legs and a constant aching pain is not life. I am rotting with each passing day waiting for death. Not living. Just surviving.