things just started getting good and i was doing okay but now everythings happening all at once and i want to die again
i have so much uni work and my entire weekend is taken up by seeing friends and im just so tired
i just want to sleep
its been over a year since i last used this site. things havent been easy, but theyve been getting better, if only slightly. the 2017 new year made me feel so much more at ease with who i was, and though all of 2017 was a bit of a mess, i managed to not kill myself. i’m doing better, even if it is only by a small margin. i found some friends who have similar issues, and i feel really comfortable around them. i havent dumped my semi-asshole boyfriend, cause we’re only going to be seeing eachother for another few months before we graduate, at […]
so my attempt at salvaging my awful grades failed, and now im further back than i started. i can see why my first attempt failed miserably, but the other two seemed okay??? but they failed regardless. Im failing at pretty much everything i set my hand to as well- i can barely hold a conversation without being seen as weird and overly awkward, i can’t even do basic things that you need to do to function. I keep forgetting to eat, and when i do its never much and always unhealthy. i haven’t cleared my room in so long that its starting to get disgusting. […]
I wish i could focus on things. I don’t have ADD or anything so its not like this shit should be hard, but for some reason it is? Im just really annoyed at myself, because i have a ton of stuff to do, but I’m not doing any of it. Instead im just wasting my time watching shitty youtube videos. I wish i could get away with not doing this stuff and avoid all of the stress that its causing me, but i have literally no reason to do that. Like what, i’m failing at writing one fucking lab draft for tomorrow, and doing my […]
So since the start of this year nothing has been going right for me.
i failed my first course at uni, and am potentially failing at least 2/3 courses that i am taking this period. the mistakes that i make are just so simple as well, and i keep looking back at them and cringing. my boyfriend broke up with me at the start of this year, now he wants to get back together but barely talks to me. no matter how hard i try i cant seem to do well in anything. my room is a mess, its full of mould because i cant […]