My coping skills are about as great as my social skills…they are shit, but I get through the best I know how. At my lowest you can find me hidden in the darkest room, music mind as loud as it will go, it blocks the world around me out and sometimes if I’m lucky it helps me to not focus so Much on my own thoughts, being left alone with ones thoughts, especially ones as morbid as my own, is a living hell I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy.
I feel like I’m at the end of my rope. I’m at my lowest. […]
bent-not-broken
I’ve blocked out most of my childhood, I have only a handful of memories etched into my brain, and quite honestly those aren’t the best memories in the world. The first real memory that I can recall, I was maybe 5. My parents were fighting, like always. But this time I remember my mom pulling out her pistol she kept hidden in her room, putting the barrel of said pistol to her head and pulling the trigger, the gun was loaded, but for some reason it didn’t discharge call it luck, or maybe the bullets were old, I really Don’t know why it didn’t blow […]
Honestly that is a question I ask myself every single day, I’ve pretty much been dead inside since the ripe young age of six (for reasons I’d rather not get into but anyone with an imagination can figure out.) At just six I felt alone, scared, confused and an array of fucked up emotions no child can even begin to understand, by the time I was 13 I was way into self harming, but to be honest it did nothing, not even the physical pain of slicing into my own skin with a razor blade could replace the dead, empty pain I felt inside. I […]