so i couldn’t really sleep so i was left all alone with my thoughts, and that’s not really a happy place for me. insert sigh here. heh i’m not used to spilling my problems out, but i thought this might help a little; that and i can think up horrible things for myself and this was a good way to distract myself. and right now any little bit is good. so i suppose i should start with the basics since this is my first actual post and non-comment. i’m 16, i’ve had a pretty good life so far, kind of distant parents, not that i […]
Author
Briar
Briar
So, since I really don't know what to write for this, I'm just going to write what I think fits. I would say I'm suicidal, but I really could care less. I think I have an emotional deficiency in a sense, but I'm not sure if that's the right wording for it. I feel really disconnected to my body and for the most part reality. I don't really feel anger, the most in that direction I've ever felt was extreme irritation, but not anger. As for the happier emotions they're really tamped down to the point where it's just a flicker. Really the best word I can think of to describe my emotional state of mind is apathetic, meaning lack of emotion or something really similar. In terms of my life I've had a pretty good one compared to some people, caring guardians (my parents aren't around much), not bullied, pretty good friends, no family with medical or mental problems, so I'm pretty sure it's considered good. Just that my emotional state is in complete shambles. I don't think there's much chance that I'll find someone that I'm attracted enough to too really change it. I guess that the other piece of info that would be relevant to this is how I act personally. I act like any other person would who has their life together. I don't give the impression often that I'm sad. I treat my friends better than I would myself. And the only real reason I'm still alive is that I haven't found a big enough reason to put the people around through any amount of heartache that might be caused by my death. I really don't know what else I might write in this section.