Author

Brink of Dawn

Ready For My End

by Brink of Dawn 10/16/2014

written by Brink of Dawn

Note: I am still adding to this.

The last straw was pulled today. My boyfriend, who I love with my entire being and essence, left me because I am “weak” and “no one wants to be with a suicidal person”.

Now before you jump to the conclusion that I am a stupid dumb teenage ***** who doesn’t know what real pain is, let me tell you that yes, I do, in fact, know what real pain is. Real emotional pain. My pain stems from multiple branches – severe social anxiety, low self-esteem, self-hatred, countless bad experiences, and loneliness. These all intertwine with eachother, every item overwhelming […]

10/16/2014 5 comments

I’m Someone Else

by Brink of Dawn 9/20/2014

written by Brink of Dawn

I’m someone else. At least that’s what I’ve felt like these past few months. I don’t feel like myself. It is hard to get out of bed. I don’t want to eat. I am unable to sleep. My smiles aren’t sincere. My laughs are half-hearted. I don’t want to be around anyone. I can barely talk to anyone. I can’t be happy. And I don’t want to live.

I hope that something can save me.

I pretend to be myself, even though I haven’t felt like myself these past few months. I get out of bed to eat. I eat because I don’t want to lose […]

9/20/2014 3 comments

What They Don’t Know

by Brink of Dawn 8/29/2014

written by Brink of Dawn

These past two months I’ve been distancing myself from my family. I isolate myself from them, try not to interact with them, and want constant time alone. Also, I’ve been pulling myself away from some of my online friends. I don’t have that many, at the most maybe 10, but still. Half of them I’ve become close to; close enough that I could tell them about my severe acne, my Social Anxiety Disorder (“So that’s why you were so quiet when we first met!”), my depression, my ummm…. suicide attempts, as embarrassing as that was, and some other things. I felt like I had to […]

8/29/2014 4 comments

I Need Help!!!!!

by Brink of Dawn 8/26/2014

written by Brink of Dawn

I want to die. All I can think about is that, and how I have no friends (save for a few I have online), how I have never had a boyfriend (except for an online one), how I won’t ever be able to make friends or get a boyfriend in real life, how I’ve been sitting around the house doing basically nothing ever since I dropped out of school in March, how I won’t be able to start some (online) college classes this semester, how my parents have forever been disappointed in me, how I can’t get a job because I can’t drive yet, how I feel completely unmotivated […]

8/26/2014 8 comments