screamed at my brother and now my throat hurts. Didn’t make a difference…. Fuck it. Never gonna get through to him. I never scream at anyone… If he doesn’t stop, he’s gonna lose a sister…
Ok it’s 2 am and I can’t sleep. Not only that, I know this feeling, the way my body feels when it’s starting one of those two-three week periods of time where I will not get any sleep… My most depressed moments… This is the first night of this one I have probly at least 2 weeks and no one I know is up at this hour and I’m so lonely and bored it hurts…Â Tired, lonely, bored, missing my razor… So if anyone at all wants to talk I’m here. or you can text me
I miss my hoodie and razor. maybe I don’t even have to cut. I just wanna hold you again, run my finger lightly over your sharp edge, feel my soft warm hoodie hiding the blood and scars under it. I’ve never missed anything so much. I’m sorry I left both of you in Virginia, so sorry. I’d give anything to be there with you….
Ok he did it. He cracked the surface. I broke down this morning. Walking a long hot walk to the bus stop and my brother wouldn’t listen to me begging him to stop messing with me, touching me and verbally abusing me. So I broke. I know there were people on the other sidewalk watching and I wish they weren’t but I started screaming “LEAVE ME ALONE! STOP DON’T TOUCH ME! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR YOUR VOICE! JUST STOP PLEASE!” and covered my ears and crouched for a moment and started walking home. Of course I turned back around and walked to the bus […]
Feel like I won’t be able to breath if I stop the music for even a second. I might break…
I’m sorry I wasn’t there as much as I could’ve been. I know I haven’t done anything to make me part of your reason for going. I’m sorry I didn’t do more though. I wish I had. Wish I could’ve. I don’t know if you’re still alive or are still waiting for the date you told me you would do it… If you’re still here or anyone here knows if she is please let me know… I’m sorry
<3 I miss him and this song makes me think of him. I miss my love. He could bring me through anything, staying up all night with me when I couldn’t sleep no matter how tired he was or what he had to do the next day. I miss you to death Seth… <3
My grandparents are still trying to control my life from here. They told me before I came down here that I can see my dad in California if he pays for it. Now they say they will do anything they can to prevent it. Now the’ve found out I want to try to get a GED this summer and will do anything to keep me in school. Usually IÂ would let that put me down but strangely I’m more motivated than I’ve ever been. I just got out of middle school and I’m gonna try for my GED this summer. I want to show them up. […]
K I haven’t been there in two years but I need somewhere to go so…. Escaping to my cave in my head. Who will I imagine is with me? Nat 🙂 First danger, a dragon. K Rogue let’s slay a dragon! In this cave I’ll confess everything and cry in your arms. Imagine your reactions and words. It’s the only thing I can do right now. Forget that I was just reminded why I HATE my stepfather and brother. Get me out… Hide with me in my cave. We can make it our own world. Just don’t let me be alone for a moment.
Fuck everyone. Just…. I won’t sleep tonight I can’t cut I am ready to hang everyone in my family and burn them. I give up I give up I give up. No one here gives a shit and I don’t fucking care about you either. And to Everlasting, I’m guessing you’re really gone. Thanks for leaving me. Thanks for that favor! I’m gonna pass it on and lead hurt people to trust me and then just fuck with thir hearts! I can say I learned from the best-so many ppl who taught me that. See how many already suicidal hearts I can crush. Seems ppl […]
I miss the people who know me. Now I know how it feels to finally see the people I badly wanted to be with because they knew me and then realize that I left behind the ones who really know me for these people who will never understand me or even care to try to learn who I am. It hurts. I thought this is what I wanted but these aren’t the people I grew up with…
I’m home… Fuck it I have no home. I thought I wanted this but I’m still fucking miserable. Guess I’ll never be really happy again. I feel more trapped […]
Hey. I did it. I survived till Florida. Thanks for all your help guys. Of course I’ll still stick around the site sometimes. My mom hasn’t noticed my scars yet but I think I’ve figurd out how I’m gonna handle it. Strangely, I’ve only been here a day and a half but all anxiety and panic attacks, stress, pain, it’s all completely dissapeared. God I’m so happy to be home. At the same time I kinda miss being miserable :/ But again, Thank you for helping me to get here alive.
Yeah I didn’t think so… Why would any of you worry about me? Anyways, sorry I’ve been gone, I’ve been safe at a friend’s house and then my grandparents saw a ‘bad’ pic on my ipod and now I cant get on a computer without them over my shoulder. Litterally. She stands right here and reads my texts and watches what i do. They’re at church right now so I get a chance to get on. Church…. My only freedom is when they are at church. Anyways… 4 days till I get on a plane for Florida. Not that it matters. My mom will probly […]
I’m scared of my mom’s reaction to my scars when I go to see her. I’m leaving in a few days and I’m just wondering if anyone has advice on how to adress this situation?
‘If you love me then go away forever’ As you wish, best friend forever… As you wish… Bye…
k I crushed pills… put them in a sandwich.. ick! threw it away and had to chug soda after the first bite. so I crushed even more and mixed it in with yogurt and it didn’t taste that bad so i took like one bite then went to get a drink and when I did my grandfather said we could go out for lunch. If he hadn’t, i would’ve finished the yogurt… oh well. I’m not worth them knowing my misery. they don’t care anyways… no one cares but my mom… What would she think? and my puppy in Florida too… I miss my Bella… […]
Anyone hear from AtTheEnd? been missing him… a lot..
I’ve accepted a while ago that we have no meds in the house that would really kill me. But I think after dinner I’ll down some meds. Just looking to go to the hospital.. I’ve never felt so alone… If anyone wants to help ease my loneliness until I do that, email or text
wolfhomepup@yahoo.com
732-907-9411
make sure to let me know who it is. Thanks…
Uck people. Fuck life, love. Love isn’t real. Love… just… God I hate everyone!!! Why the fuck did you make me human? I’d rather be anything else!! Screw everything. Thanks god for fucking up everything! I’m fucking sick of these rage moments. I hate you god for doing this. Can’t you at least give me the courage to take my life? Or take it yourself? I hate you too!