Author

Enough2015

Methods Methods Methods

by Enough2015 8/27/2015

written by Enough2015

I’m about 13 hours too late when i read a farewell post by Wndozh8r. Very upsetting to see him go but i understand both sides.

SP, i just wish you would rethink this rule. People contemplating suicide will either do it or not. It’s just a matter of time for me. If it weren’t for Wndozh8r there would’ve been good chance that i would suffer a very painful attempt and survive. My family, friends and colleagues would find out my dark secret. I could even be locked up in a pysch ward. My survival would be a bigger nightmare than this current one I’m living.

Even though […]

8/27/2015 16 comments

At work

by Enough2015 8/26/2015

written by Enough2015

I’m currently sitting at my desk catching up on SP and had a giggle at the earlier addiction post. There were some funny/entertaining posts by some great regulars.

Then i switch to news. Com.au and the real world is fkd. I see heart breaking headlines of shootings, oppressed north Korea, typhoon, angry mobs, transgender murder, isis blasts ancient temple, zimbabwe lifts hunting restriction and so on.

Such a depressing world.

But I’m glad i got sp. Here i can believe in the goodness of humanity.

8/26/2015 5 comments

Hmmm

by Enough2015 8/26/2015

written by Enough2015

8/26/2015 33 comments

Comfort?

by Enough2015 8/25/2015

written by Enough2015

I originally joined this forum seeking advice regarding methods. Then found comfort in posting sadness.

A few weeks later I’m just commenting like a chat forum. Maybe not a few weeks, I’m still new, time drags when you’re miserable.

Why did you join this forum?
Why are you still here?

8/25/2015 65 comments

Crushed

by Enough2015 8/24/2015

written by Enough2015

I got a call back from Exit International today. I left a message 2 days ago asking if i could attend the next meeting in Sept. They told me I can’t go to a meeting unless I’m a member. I can’t join unless I’m over 50 or seriously ill.

As for the book, same conditions-50 or ill.

The next ‘public’ meeting won’t be for another year. I really was looking forward to attending so i could prepare-how, when, where. Just wanted an end game planned.

I haven’t looked into other avenues or loopholes to the 50/ill rule. Just the first time today i had a […]

8/24/2015 1 comment

Mixed emotions

by Enough2015 8/21/2015

written by Enough2015

When i thought this site was making me sadder because i face my depression at a more intense level, i read things that do make me laugh. I am NOT laughing at other peoples misery or posts, I’m not that cruel. Just an entertaining comment here and there.

So i will continue on this site a little longer even though it makes being in denial that little harder. Or maybe I’m just going through a good cycle. Who knows

8/21/2015 2 comments

How do others see you?

by Enough2015 8/19/2015

written by Enough2015

This site is the only place where i can express deep sadness. I’ve never really let others know how depressed i am.

I’ve withdrawn myself from my good friends.

My work friends see me as this happy, funny person most of the times. They also know I’m a hater too.

The people i dislike think I’m mean and rude.

With so many of you out there feeling sad, how do the people in your life see you?

8/19/2015 7 comments

Frustrated

by Enough2015 8/19/2015

written by Enough2015

There are days i just can’t forget the pain.

I get angry during the day when I’m around others. Mostly about being forced to live this life i never asked for or wanted.

Others just see me as a cranky mean *****. If only they knew.

Then i go home and cry until there are no more tears. It lasts for hours, I’m exhausted and fall asleep.

8/19/2015 2 comments

Relief

by Enough2015 8/13/2015

written by Enough2015

For most of my life I wished i was never born. I’ve never seriously thought about suicide methods as it was something i thought i couldn’t do.

Last night i felt myself taking a step closer towards the act. Although I’m not quite ready yet, the thought of knowing relieved my pain a little. I could see an end to my misery, whereas before it was indefinite.

I’m not posting this because i need attention. I just have no one to say it to and i need it.

8/13/2015 4 comments

Unsure

by Enough2015 8/12/2015

written by Enough2015

I found myself here while googling suicide by carbon monoxide poisoning.

I’m almost 40 years old. I have always thought of suicide but never brave enough to do it. Some people really don’t belong here on earth and I know I am one of them. As I get older I realise it will happen, just don’t know when. I don’t want to die, I just don’t want to live anymore.

It is winter here and I’m hearing on the news about accidental carbon monoxide deaths, like bringing in a charcoal bbq to keep warm.

I thinkk this is my preferred method. Has anyone had a failed attempt?

Ah crap. […]

8/12/2015 17 comments