I wrote on here the other day about my life has fallen apart completely. I feel completely hopeless and trapped inside my own head, and in the days since that post, I’ve gotten blackout drunk, stopped taking my bipolar meds and had random anonymous sex 2 nights in a row because I have no other way to escape the way I feel. I hate being sober because all I can do is obsess about how my meds aren’t working, about how I can’t seem to pull it together and find hope in anything, and about how the one person I’ve ever truly loved in life […]
The past 5 months have been the most miserable in my entire life. I’ve been through some really horrible things, but nothing compares to how I feel right now. After getting really depressed and having horrible anxiety attacks after my college graduation, I got physically sick, was misdiagnosed with major depressive disorder, given anti-depressants that made me extremely ill, attempted suicide and landed in the psych ward. While in the psych ward, my boyfriend at the time completely stopped talking to me. I got out of the hospital, broke up with him, moved out of the country and started a new job, but got really, […]