Living and dying. It’s all the same to me. I don’t care either way.
If I’m probably not actually going to do anything to kill myself (despite feeling like it sometimes and having a plan) because, basically, I don’t see a point in it – does that mean I’m not suicidal?
Just curious.
Most of the time, I don’t need people. They’re irrelevant. I can manage ok without them, better in fact as I find people tiring. I have to smile and laugh and pretend everything is fine. It’s so much easier by myself. I can relax and be myself – even if that means crying in a corner. At least I have that freedom when I’m alone. But every so often I find myself reaching out. Trying to find someone to listen to me, to accept me – to like me. I want acceptance and to be admired. I want people to be surprised by my intellect […]
It may sound counterintuitive but I consider the wish to die to be a sign of hope. After all, what is that person saying other than, I HOPE that what comes after life, whether it be nothing or another life, is better than this one. It is the HOPE of something better which makes us reach for something else. Without that hope, what’s the point in dying?
And it must be hope that drives that wish as there is NO information on what happens after death. It may be that we simply cease. It may be that we experience an afterlife full of peace and love, […]
I’d forgotten what it felt like – to be happy. I can’t even remember the last time I felt like this. Let me explain…
It was a normal day and I, as usual, was feeling my normal self ie. not so good. I was crying – pleading with the powers that be to help me – somehow. And that’s when I got the idea. I came up with a method that I think will work. I won’t go into details, obviously, but that’s when I felt happy. I found myself smiling – an actual genuine smile. Not a false one – not because it’s expected of me – but […]
This is the first thing I’ve written (if you can call it that) in over 6 months. I laughingly call it a poem. It doesn’t rhyme or anything. I’m sorry. I don’t even know why I’m posting it. I don’t normally share this kind of thing. I guess I’m just being sad and pathetic. Sorry.
I fall
into the pit of despair
it grabs my heart as it steals my soul
I’m lost
nowhere to go
no-one to help
and it’s my fault
no-one can know the pain I feel
no-one can know how empty I can be
the times when I look at the world […]
I know I’m a little late for Solstice but here are some songs (not mine) that might help to put a smile on some faces…maybe.
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLDC3E828DCD12B68D
I particularly like the one entitled ‘It’s the most horrible time of the year’ (number 14)Â – just saying.
I hope everyone finds some semblance of peace, if that’s possible. Good luck.
I’ve been reading here, off and on, for a little while now. Most of you, as far as I can see, have had horrible lives. I can understand why you’d be in such pain and feel so bad about yourselves when you’ve been through so much. In many ways I envy you. My life is fine. I’ve not been abused or addicted to anything or any of the 101 horrible things that can and have happened to you. You have a reason to feel bad. I don’t. The only thing wrong with my life is me.
Some of you cut yourselves or have actually tried to commit […]
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