It’s all lost.
The hope.
The love.
The truth.
I only asked that I could be happy, and I get a life full of loneliness, hatred, and failure. And as I was watching my own demise, I saw how much I had ruined other lives in the process. I tried to repair it, I tried to come back and fix it all, but it only showed how little I could accomplish. In my downfall, I had friends for a short period. Or at least I thought I did. The truth was they felt sorry for me. They saw a helpless little shit, and thought they […]
I was born with a loving, caring, and forgiving family. To most people, that’s a blessing. But to me, it only makes it harder for me to make them pleased, or even tolerant of anything. It only makes my life worse. I already hate me, so does everyone else, so my own family were like the only people who I could trust at all, and now they are like people I never even knew. It just sickens me to see what I have done to these great people, and what I can do to all those with a pure heart, unlike mine.
I’ve ruined everything. I destroyed all that I loved.
I’ve come to believe that I made everyone hate me.
Nothing can save me, because they wouldn’t if they could.
I made friends worry for me over my mistakes, it destroys me, and I know this is my fault.
I make my own family want me to leave, at only the age of 13.
They won’t admit it, but i know it. As everyone says, “actions speak louder than words.” and their actions show how much of a dissapointment.
But I cannot do it.
They will think it is their fault.
And that only will make […]
My father just called me a worthless piece of crap, and it’s my fault. My 8 year old brother is on the couch bored and helpless, and it’s my fault. My mother is barley making it through the day, and it’s my fault. I’m a miserable little fuck, and IT’S MY FAULT.
Is it wrong to kill yourself if you truly believe it will make other lives happier? Or is that still considered selfish? Because I want to help others, not myself.
Every night I cry because of the disappointment I cause. The burden I put on others, the loathing I direct at myself, It only leads to a life of sadness and despair. I’ve made my brother a monster, I made my father believe that I am just another mistake, and worst of all, I made my own mother cry because of my failures, and she believes it’s her fault, when it’s really my own mistake. When they ask for help, I don’t even have the energy to respond. And now I believe that I can never fix it, so I believe suicide is the only […]